Plastic Revolution

Hello 2011, please wipe your feet.

2011-01-03T10:32:00.000-05:00

Over at Holyoke Home there is a great post about New Years Resolutions and actionable and achievable goals. I wasn't going to commit to any resolutions this year publicly, but after reading that blog post I realized I do have resolutions and telling you you will help me hold myself accountable.

Last year I blogged my resolutions and I kept most of them. I did learn to make sushi from my friend over at We are All Beasts. I did use less, including getting myself this amazing thing. I did smile more.
I smiled when I replaced my car, when my kids threw me a huge surprise birthday party, when I got the best gift ever from Sutters jewelry and when all the fund raising events I worked on went extra well. I was less judgmental, even when it was really, really hard. I painted and drew and even made some jewelry, I took two art classes. I did let Nick take a girl to the movies. I took compliments better, I think. Maybe.

So this year I will set more goals. Actionable and achievable goals.

I will loose some undefined amount of weight by cutting out the junk that has been creeping back into my life. I will cook more soups instead of buying them in a can for lunch. I won't put feta cheese on my salad (at least not every day) I'll cut back on coffee and cake. I'll stop eating in the car, in a rush. Back to Yoga twice a week and maybe the occasional Zumba class. I'll do one of the dozens of walk run things that are going to help save the world in someones memory.

I will do the Hot Chocolate run in 2011. I will take my vitamins every damn day.

I will listen more and talk less. Really. (...This might be a two year resolution)

I will find a new job that has meaning, even if it means less money. At this new job I will be able to walk to work (unless it's really freaking cold, I hate the cold)

And once again I will keep my chin up, I will not let lifes obstacles throw me. I will get though this year and it will be ~~just as good~~ better then last year. After all, no one drowns from falling in the water...

...they drown by staying there.

You cannot read Loss

2010-12-29T12:04:00.000-05:00

You cannot read loss, or think about it or know it. You cannot be prepared for it or brace for it and come to terms with it either.

It just is.

Janice Kenneman

All you can do is feel it.

My Aunt Jany passed away Saturday the 18th of December. It was sudden and unexpected. I had not been close to her for many years and as a child I only saw her occasionally. I always thought she was so .. cool. Calm, collected and reasonable in ways few of the adults in my every day world ever were or would be. I remember her laugh was always a little bit throaty and made her eyes dance. That phrase 'eyes that dance' is utter nonsense when used to describe most people but for her it makes sense.

When I was maybe 11 or 12 I was visiting their house in East Hartford (they had the coolest bathroom in Connecticut) and she wanted to take a picture of me and cousin Nicky, and her daughter Rene all sitting on the couch. We were sitting there smiling like the models we all thought we were and then heard a funny noise above us. We looked up to see a teeny... tiny... bat.

Ever heard three preteen girls screech at the same time?

Aunt Jany laughed for an hour, I swear.

Later, about 5 or 6 years ago, Aunt Jany and I began to email each other. She got up at dawn each day and would sit and have her coffee while she read her emails and the news. I'd chat with her for 20 minutes or so before I went to work. After a year or so I changed jobs and the early morning emails tapered off.

I regret that.

I am so glad to have had you in my life however briefly it may have been.

Eat yer weeds!

2010-07-08T10:03:00.000-04:00

Always be careful not to gather wild edibles within 50 feet of any regularly traveled road. Disclaimer: Poison Sumac is POISON.

The red or staghorn sumac is not the same as poison sumac which has white, drooping berries. Look for the red, upright clusters of seeds on the edible type sumac. These seeds are ripe in August and September....when the white crystals form on the surface and before the autumn rains wash the flavor off.

Edible sumac

Dangerous bad will kill you to death Sumac

berries

Plant

If you try any of these please let me know!

SUMAC LEMONADE

The fruit of the staghorn sumac (Rhushirta) was frequently used by Indians and pioneers to make a cool, sour drink. The name staghorn comes from the likeness of the down-covered branches to deer's antlers. The fruit clusters are plucked and boiled in water, strained and sugar is added to give the juice an agreeable lemonade-like flavor.

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SUMAC MERINGUE PIE

Take 4 or 5 red sumac seed heads. (Do not wash for the flavor is concentrated on outside of berries.) Cover with water; bring to a boil, strain through a cloth. Add water if necessary to make 2 cupsful.

Combine: 1 1/2 c. sugar 1/2 tsp. salt

Add 2 cups hot sumac extract prepared as above. Cook in double boiler until thick. Beat 3 egg yolks; add a little of the hot mixture. Stir and pour back into double boiler. Cook 2 minutes longer.

Remove from heat. Add 2 tablespoons butter; cool. Pour into baked pie shell. Top with meringue prepared by beating 3 egg whites with 6 tablespoons sugar. Bake at 350 degrees until browned.

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ELDERBERRY AND SUMAC JELLY

Cover sumac with water. Pound and stir for 10 minutes; strain to make an extraction.

2 c. sumac extract

1 pkg. Sure Jell

5 c. sugar

Bring juice, extract, and Sure Jell to a boil. Add sugar and hard boil for 1 minute. Remove from heat and skim. Pour into jars and seal immediately.

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Cattail Casserole

2 cups of scraped bud material

1 cup of bread crumbs

1 egg

½ cup of milk

salt to taste

pepper to taste

"…scrape the bud material from the cores, mix 2 cups of buds with 1 cup of bread crumbs, a beaten egg and ½ cup of milk. Then salt and black pepper to taste and bake in a casserole dish in a medium oven for 25 minutes."

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Juniper Marinade

Ingredients:

1/4 cup red wine vinegar

1 and 1/2 cups red wine (Burgundy works well)

4 Juniper berries

1 bay laurel leaf

6 whole peppercorns

1 medium onion, sliced

1 small clove garlic, crushed

1 tsp. salt

4 pinches mace

2 whole cloves

1/8 tsp. thyme

4 pounds meat or game

Directions:

Combine all the ingredients and store in a covered jar in the refrigerator for at least one day before using. Place the meat or game in a bowl and pour marinade over it. Turn the meat every couple of hours to allow the marinade to penetrate. Marinate at room temperature for 1 to 2 days depending on how strong a marinade flavor you like. Strain the marinade and use it to baste the meat every 20 minutes while it roasts. One pint of marinade is adequate for 4 pounds of meat. Serves 8.

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Black Birch Tea

"To make a wintergreen-flavored tea, cut some sweet birch twigs in small pieces and cover them with boiling birch sap. Let it steep for a minute or two, then strain out the twigs and sweeten the tea to taste. Some like to add cream or hot milk…

"Birch Tea can also be made of the red, inner bark of sweet birches, but removing this bark from standing timber disfigures and injures the trees. If sweet birches are being cut down anyway, as in land clearing or limbering, one can gather a supply of this fragrant bark without feeling like a vandal. The bark from the stumps and roots is considered best. Use a knife or a carpenter’s wood scraper to remove the outer, dry layer and then peeel off the red inner bark. It peels best in the spring or early summer. If this is cut in small pieces and dried at ordinary room temperature, then sealed in fruit jars one can have the makings of Birch Tea throughout the year. Use boiling water when birch sap is not available. Never boil the twigs or bark in making this tea and never dry the bark in too warm a place, for the wintergreen flavor is very volatile, and is easily driven off by too much heat."

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Mulled Sumac

Ingredients:

4 cups sumacade

4 whole cloves

1 stick of cinnamon

1/2 tsp. allspice

1/3 cup brown sugar

1 lemon

freshly grated nutmeg

Directions:

Put the sumacade in a saucepan and add the cloves, cinnamon, allspice, and sugar. Add the slices of lemon peel and juice of the lemon. Heat the mixture over low heat for 20 minutes. Do not let it boil. Pour into glasses and add a little grated nutmeg on top. Serves 4 to 6. For a winter warm-up, try adding 1/2 ounce of rum.

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Dandelion Coffee

Ingredients:

1/4 cup dandelion roots

2 tsp. chocolate bits

2 tbs. rum

Directions:

Collect dandelion roots from healthy plants. Wash and scrub roots to remove all dirt. Dry the roots thoroughly and roast in a 250 degree oven for 2 to 4 hours, until they are brittle and dark brown inside. Grind them and use the powder to make a 4 cups coffee. A drip pot with filter paper works well. Add chocolate and rum to serve after dinner. Serves 4.

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Dating 2.0

2010-07-02T09:34:00.001-04:00

A rainbow seemed a good choice to begin this post with. Hopeful, bright and colorful.

Lately I have been really busy so it may seem like the worst time ever to be thinking about dating but, it turns out that when I am busy ... I think about it the most. It would be nice to have someone to talk to at 11 pm when I am finally done with the day. Also, it would be nice to not always be the odd one out. Not that I mind terribly but it would make tables at restaurants more, you know, even.

So I guess the first step is picking a site.

Plenty of fish? Match.com?

The second step is writing an ad.

This.. could take awhile. Any help would be appreciated!

The last step is choosing some photos.

(thanks to Peter this shouldn't be too hard.)

Still here, still thankfull

2010-07-01T09:32:00.000-04:00

I'm too busy to write, really. Tonight though, I am going to the very first Holyoke writers meet-up and I am feeling inspired in a ragged way. My favorite way to write when I do not have time to write? Lists, natch.

Things I am thankful for

1. Cold pressed coffee (Thanks Maggie and Nancy)

2. More friends then I can recall in an academy award acceptance speech.

3. Kids who wash dishes and water gardens

4. White out tape

5. Fancy foot lotion and socks

Things I could really do without

1. Paper logs

2. Another meeting

3. Invader Zim cartoons on Netflix streaming

4. My lab partner

5. My lecture professor who seems to have checked out of the class so .. actually I guess I am already doing without him.

Things I want

1. Naps

2. A new car antennae and someone to fix that for me

3. A washin' machine and a hook up

4. 2 thousand bucks

5. More naps

Things said recently

1. "Spiders are good luck, unless they eat your face off, then.. they suck." -Nick

2. "Well SOMEONE got some sun." -work friend in an angry tone.

3. "Excuse me, I have a business call" -Zak

4. "Can I sit on your lap?" - Helena

5. "OMG There is a huge Zucchini under there!" -Rachel

Fourth of July plans

1. Cook out on Friday, then fireworks!

2. Saturday: Yoga, laundry, block party meeting.

3. Sunday: Yoga... nap?

4. Monday: Werk

5. Homework! Every day.

Whats new with you?! ... is anyone here?

Extra! Extra!

2010-01-14T20:38:00.004-05:00

So.. I blog for the Masslive Parenting Project now. But I probably can't swear there so don't worry! I will still post here.. at least whenever I want to write bad words and call people names.

Check me out here and leave comments! Maybe then I will one day get PAID to do this. :o)

Less then Plastic Resolutions

2010-01-01T21:46:00.005-05:00

This is one of my favorite photos from 2009. We were at my cousin Nicole's place, a nifty restored old house on the Westfield river. We took a picnic lunch and the kids (I took a personal day from work) and went swimming. In 2010 I want more days like that care free happy day.

I resolve to take compliments better. I will not shrug them off, deny them or make excuses. I will accept them gracefully.

I will say yes more often. To myself, to my children, to my friends, to handsome men in hats and too chocolate cake. Mostly to the cake.

Which bring me to the obligatory "I will lose 20 pounds this year" resolution. Blah, I have a woman's hips which works out well because I am a women. So.. more salad, yes. But also, more cake. More Sushi too! I'll stop saving that treat for special occasions.

I will learn at least two of the following.
Sewing
Making Sushi
Book binding
Photography
Tennis

I will buy less, use less, consume less and throw less away.

I will smile more. At you.

I will be less judgmental. Seriously. Who the eff am I?

I will dedicate more time to my art. Whatever it may be.

I will do what the boys want to do more often. Hiking, biking, playing Guitar Hero, eating at gross Friendly's and maybe.. just maybe.. letting Nick take a girl to the movies. (But probably not, who am I kidding?)

Mostly though I resolve to make the best of 2010. I will not kneel to any circumstance, I will not give in or give up. Like compliments I will take each little crisis and calamity in stride, with a smile and never forget that.. this too shall pass.

Dear Nick

2009-12-26T13:34:00.002-05:00

Dear Nickolas,

Yesterday you turned 13. For weeks now I have been preoccupied with this birthday which seems to effect me over any previous birthday any of us have had.

Scenes from the day you were born flash though my memory as you blow out 13 candles with your super cool floppy haircut and devil may care half smile. Your braces cannot even detract from the effortless cool you carry. I won't gross you out with details but there was blood and screaming and your father had to leave the room when things reached... when they got bad. When you finally arrived, you did not scream and cry as you should have. You barely gave us a whimper and I knew, innately that SOMETHING WAS WRONG. It was just like that too, a big meaningless sentence. No one spoke to me as you were poked and prodded and then finally cried, soft but alive. I cried too. I was not allowed to hold you but they let me see you, briefly. Already they were sticking needles in your tiny arms and a plastic tent over your head to keep you breathing. Ask me what terror feels like.

A moment later you were gone and the anesthesiologist spoke as your Daddy walked back into the room, pale and shaky. (Later he would tell me he had gotten sick in the hallway from the stress and the fear and seeing so much blood)

"You must be starving, I'll get you a meal."

"That would be nice." I replied.

8 hours later I woke up. It was Christmas afternoon and a Doctor was there, telling me things that I couldn't wrap my head around. Water in your lungs, transient tachypnea of the newborn , birth stress, oxygen levels, MRI, CPR.. too many big words and mismatches initials. All I heard, all I could understand was that my son, who I had not yet held, was dying.

For two days I sat in the Newborn Intensive Care Unit pumping breast milk for you (don't be grossed out, really) and talking to you. I made you promises.

The impossible.
"If you just be strong I will take you to the park every day for the rest of your life."

And the important.
"I'll never let you go, never leave you."

You heard me, I think. I'd like to think you did because you came back to us. The hood was removed, needles extracted until one day as I sat in my room, still recovering from blood loss and my own injuries, your Daddy walked in the room and gave me the best gift of my life.

You.

It was the first time I had ever held you in my arms. You were six days old.

Today you are a teenager but you are still, sometimes, that cute 3 year old who fell asleep on his wooden ride on airplane because you couldn't bear to part with it. It was pink and second hand but you did not care. It was an 'arghpaned!' and nothing else mattered.

When you were 5 I gave you a bucket of homemade bubbles and left you in the yard while I got your baby brother down for a nap. When I came back, no less then five minutes later, you were soaked in soapy water, bare ass naked and running around with the bubble wand gleefully. You invented happiness.

I watched you Christmas eve with the mug you did not want. When you smiled and said it would hold lots of hot cocoa I had to refrain from reaching over and hugging you. You always see the bright side. Did you get that from me? Or is that all your own?

Last night you heard me tell Pepe that you were the 'great event' in my life that made me wake up. Having you, nearly losing you and then getting you all over again was exactly what I needed then. I needed to understand the value of life. Of my own life. Every day since then has been a journey to be better then I was before, a better mother, a better friend, a better human being. Thank you.

Lastly I want to tell you I am sorry for how much responsibility you bear. I wish you felt more carefree and had less to worry about. Our lives have not been easy, I know. But I hope one day, Nick, you will look back and be grateful for your childhood, for it's hardships and struggles and shining moments of unrivaled joy because those will be the things that make you into the wonderful man you are so close to being.

Love,
Mom

A heartbeat away

2009-12-25T07:52:00.005-05:00

Images snagged from Peter.

Last night from the window of Vega Yoga I watched an apartment building on Lyman St burn. 15 families lived there and countless families have lived there in the past. It was heartbreaking to watch. My thoughts, as they always do in such situations, turned to the after effects of this fire. Homelessness, tragedy, loss. No one died in the fire but it looks as though everyone lost all their belongings.

Two days before Christmas.

It was a low income building and it is not lost on me that I have lived in a similar building, I know first hand what Christmas is like in those places. I know how much it hurts to lose hard earned Christmas gifts, things you have scrimped and saved for. I know what it is like to eat ramen noodles 3 days a week to buy some trivial but coveted gift for a child. To lose that feels like all your insides have suddenly burst into flames and then melted, the world tilts a little and you feel overcome with an urge to cry and stomp your feet and shout “It’s not fair!”

It is not fair.

I called the Red Cross but they were unable to offer any way to help those particular families. You can send them money or drop off clothing but it all goes into a pool for disaster relief which is great and all but I would really like to do something for the Lyman St families.

This Christmas is a tough one for us but nothing at all compared to how tough it could be or has been. One Christmas we were robbed. Once there were only a few dollar store gifts and once there was only a paper tree. In comparison this is a wonderful Christmas for my children and me. We are together; we are warm and well fed and happy.

Christmas eve we will be with wonderful new friends who have come to mean so much to us. Christmas Day we will be with people we are not related too but have been my family in every way that matters since I was an angry and confused 14 year old girl who needed someone to look past my outrage and my mother and see the girl I really was. People who, without fail, love us.

I will keep in mind, every moment, those 15 families who just lost everything at the end of a year that was full of growth and laughter for us. Keeping them in mind will remind me (as if I need reminding) that we are all only a moment away from poverty and devastation.

More Photos from amazing local photographers and dear friends.

http://seethebrick.blogspot.com

http://www.flickr.com/photos/29133656@N03/sets/72157623058930366/show/

Coolest kids in the 'Yoke!

2009-12-13T00:30:00.001-05:00

Naked girls.

2009-12-10T22:57:00.002-05:00

It seems like last week that Nick was still shorter then me. Actually it very well could have been last week, he grows so.. fast. Sometimes I look over at him at home and my heart flutters in a sort pf panicked way. Every inch is another pull away from my own youth and from his youth.

People keep commenting on how pretty soon he won’t want to talk to me anymore but to those people I thumb my nose. I am pretty sure Nick will always feel comfortable talking to me. Not every child becomes a surly angry teen. I have already laid the groundwork with my children for openness, even when it makes us uncomfortable or angry. My boys know I am always ready to listen.. even when I don’t want too. Even when it is about girls.

The boys are sharing a birthday party this weekend and I ordered a Sponge Bob cake for them.

Nick: You got me a Sponge Bob cake for my 13th birthday?

Me, happily: Yes, you like Sponge Bob.

Nick stares at me, waiting.

I sigh.

Me: Well, what did you want? A cake with swimsuit models on it?

And he grinned.

From London to Holyoke

2009-12-05T17:52:00.006-05:00

ThanksGiving 09

2009-11-27T16:50:00.002-05:00

Last year the boys and I made a small turkey dinner and hung out in our jammies all day. I think at some point I napped and then I worked on a paper about how Little Red Riding Hood is actually a cautionary tale about dating the wrong kind of men. . It was a dull, dreary day for us and this year I decided not to repeat it. I wanted to take what could have been the worst Thanksgiving for us in years and make it the best ever. I refused to focus on what we have lost and do not have and instead told the boys this year we would focus entirely on how much we do have. Once we did that we realized we have so much.

All three of us are healthy. We have no significant health issues.

We have a roof over our heads, a wood floor under our feet and warm things to wear in the cold.

We all have access to education, books, music and culture.

And we have wonderful friends.

So we invited those friends, all of them, to come by and have a meal or a drink or just to say hello. And they came, in pairs and alone, in a hurry and taking their time. With breads and brussels sprouts and delicious pies. They came with hugs and smiles and easy laughter. A generous friend washed my dishes! Nick made a pumpkin cheesecake and Zak showed off his Soccer winnings over and over again.

When I finally got to bed last night it was well after midnight and I was exhausted, I’d cooked for 6 hours and talked for 6 more! I left the kitchen a disaster but its okay, it was worth it. I think we will do this every year on Thanksgiving.

We are making our own definition of family.

Other small things I am thankful for this year. Besides the obvious…

Yellow high lighters

Drawing classes at night

The confidence to be photographs in yoga poses.

Pumpkin Spice coffee

Splenda

Hampshire tailors

Meeting old friends and making them new again

Wooden spoons

Having windows in my office

Etsy

5 o’clock working committee meetings.

And my unfailing ability to pick myself up, dust myself off and get the hell on with the business of every day.

What, besides the obvious family, friends etc are YOU thankful for?

Eleven.

2009-11-25T21:22:00.001-05:00

Dear Zak,

Today you turn eleven. I wish you wouldn’t. I wish I could keep you small and sweet forever. Today you are eleven and filled with your own ideas and thoughts opinions that differ from my own. It is a bittersweet discovery to find you are becoming your own person and that person is not a reflection of my own thoughts and ideals. I could not be prouder of you for it.

You were a small baby, seven pounds seven ounces but you were perfect. Unlike your older brothers journey into this world there was no blood, no machinery, nothing was sliced or diced. You simply arrived when you were ready and without a fuss.

‘I’m here now.” You seemed to say. “The rest of your life can begin just as soon as you get me a blanket.” Your father cut the cord after it stopped pulsing, when you no longer needed it. His hand shook and I would be a liar if I did not admit I was nervous. You hardly cried for the two days we were in the hospital and I took all the credit for that. You were the perfect newborn baby. Karma loves a good joke. Two months later you began to cry and I do not think you stopped until you were four. You tested my patience repeatedly but still you were my baby, my youngest and likely last, child.

Your brother loved you immediately. Countless times I found him by your basket, by the swing, by the crib talking to you, soothing you, showing you his toys and how cool they were and promising that one day you could play with them too.

You have always been headstrong. You refused to wear underwear for a year. The next year it was a refusal of socks. And then in kindergarten you insisted on wearing the same pants every day for a month. You drove me crazy and you still do but I see myself in you and better still, I see such strength.

Everywhere we go people flock to you. You’re a modern day Prince Charming, handsome and thoughtful. You ask people how they are, you smile at them and pay attention. You take in interest in what other people like and do. These are invaluable traits. Every day you ask how my day was. You still want to hold my hand and you will sit with me no matter who sees.

Today you turn eleven. On the day you were born I loved you more then I could fathom and as impossible as it may seem.. I love you eleven times more today then I did then. With every smile, every giggle, every question and every moment I love you even more.

Nogs, please!

2009-11-22T13:13:00.000-05:00

My baby turns eleven in a few days. I feel my youth shrivel up just a tiny bit when I say that. Since both of my children have birthdays in the next 31 days and Christmas is coming as well, they share a birthday gift. Last year they got a Wii, this year.. well I have no idea yet. They will have a big pizza party together too.

I still try to recognize each childs birthday separately and this year Zaks falls on the day before Thanksgiving. So yesterday we had this brief conversation in the kitchen.

Zak: “Are we doing anything on my birthday?”

Me: “We will have a cake on Thanksgiving but the night before will be really busy, do you mind if we don't?”

Zak: “Ok but can we have eggnog on my birthday?”

Me: “Sure.. really?”

Zak: “Yea! Can you make it? With eggs from the farm? Can you get nogs? Are they expensive?”

........

Me: “Of course I will get you nogs, I will hunt them down and pay whatever I have too because I love you.”

Nick: scoffs from the next room.

Me: “You shush!”

Zak: “AWESOME!”

Parenting means never missing an opportunity to remind your kid why you are the best mother ever.

To that note.. is anyone there?

The bard and the wooden spoon.

2009-11-20T21:33:00.002-05:00

I know a bank where the wild thyme blows,
Where oxlips and the nodding violet grows
Quite overcanopied with luscious woodbine,
With sweet musk-roses and with elgantine.
A Midsummer’s Night Dream

I took the boys to see a Shakespeare show at the Holyoke Public Library the other night. You should have been there! It was incredible. One guy stands up there doing different monologues and sonnets but with these great, amusing little explanations about them. I did not expect my boys to hang out for long but, to my surprise (and swollen parental pride) they did.

At one point the actor paused and asked Nick how old he was. Nick blushed, being the only kid there.

"Uh.. 12?" He replied nervously.

"PERFECT!" The man boomed, making us all jump and chuckle. "Because that is exactly how old Romeo was in this next scene!"

He went on to explain how the balcony scene, where Romeo only sees Juliet, is not really a love scene at all. Romeo does not love Juliet then, he is simply admiring her in a fantastical, hormonal, adolescent way. He is enthralled with her eleven year old beauty and see's her as not a person at all but a piece of fine art, to be cherished and looked upon. Really.. the scene is funny, because Romeo is a bit of a goof in it.

ROMEO [Coming forward.]:
But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?
It is the East, and Juliet is the sun!
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou her maid art far more fair than she.
Be not her maid, since she is envious.
Her vestal livery is but sick and green,
And none but fools do wear it. Cast it off.
It is my lady! O, it is my love!
O, that she knew she were!
She speaks, yet she says nothing.
What of that? Her eye discourses; I will answer it.
I am too bold; 'tis not to me she speaks.
Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven
Having some business, do entreat her eyes
To twinkle in their spheres till they return.
What if her eyes were there, they in her head?
The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars
As daylight doth a lamp; her eyes in heaven
Would through the airy region stream so bright
That birds would sing and think it were not night.
See how she leans her cheek upon her hand!
O, that I were a glove upon that hand,
That I might touch that cheek!

It was the best introduction to Shakespeare my children could have gotten.

Afterwards they went up to the man and spoke to him briefly. They got some recommendations for which plays they might like and discussed the speeches they liked best. I was disgustingly proud of my boys that night.

Onto the wooden spoon. Before the show began I was speaking with some "Friends" and I remarked, yet again, how I think we need dishes and cups that can be washed. The amount of waste we create at our events with paper plates and plastic single use cups is, to me, excessive and unacceptable. They did not disagree, people rarely do. It would also save us money and who isn’t in favor of that?

I mentioned some of the things I do. I have a set of dishes at work. Plate, bowl, cup, 2 coffee mugs, a set of chopsticks, fork, knife and spoon as well as a cloth napkin. In my purse I often keep a set of utensils made of bamboo for take out occasions. As always, someone was impressed and wished they too could be so dedicated.

And there it is. The great farce.

I am not so dedicated! I still buy Dunkin' Donuts coffee in polystyrene cups and I still buy store bread in plastic bags. Sometimes I forget my bags and use plastic, sometimes I forget my fork and use the disposable one. I am, by no means, environmentally perfect. I am simply working towards a goal. Every now and again I will add something to my list of things I do to save the world and now and again I will forget to do them here and there.

I oppose big box stores but I went down to Ikea last month.

I 'eat locally' but I buy strawberries in February.

I buy used clothing but have a shiny new cell phone.

I started using chemical free, organic make up but.. it comes shipped from Sweden.

For me being environmentally friendly is all about compromises. Sometimes I make them, sometimes the world does.

I can be a hypocrite but only in the eyes of others. People assume since I talk about being green I must be 110 percent green. But I am much more of a pretty sage color with flecks of gold.

I am perfectly imperfect.

I hope no one ever feels like they must be Deep Dark 100 Percent Greenie Green in order to make a difference. Every little tiny change does make a difference and don’t you let anyone ever tell you different.

The one who loves you

2009-11-16T20:44:00.006-05:00

When you're all alone and blue
No one to tell your troubles to
Remember me, I'm the one who loves you

When this world has turned you down
And not a true friend can be found
Remember me, I'm the one who loves you

And through all kinds of weather
You'll find I'll never change
Through the sunshine and the shadows
I'll always be the same

We're together right or wrong
Where you go I'll tag along
Remember me, I'm the one who loves you

And through all kinds of weather
You'll find I'll never change
Through the sunshine and the shadows
I'll always be the same

We're together right or wrong
Where you go I'll tag along
Remember me, I'm the one who loves you
Remember me, I'm the one who loves you
-Dean Martin

The littlest things

2009-11-13T21:06:00.002-05:00

The littlest things make us happy. No, really. It’s not about your fancy car or your stylish shoes. It’s not about your Mcmansion or your prestigious degree. Right now, in this moment.. none of it matters. Because none of it makes you smile.

What does make us smile are the littlest things.

Last night my youngest son asked to stay at the Laundromat with me ‘to keep me company’.

“I’m just going to read, I really won’t want to talk or play.” I told him, somewhat annoyed.

“I know, It’s ok, I brought a book!” He held up a book I bought him at the school book fair and said he would never read. There he was, wanting to just sit next to me and read it. And read it he did. I never read much of my own book because he kept stopping to tell me about the amazing adventure in his own story.

That made me smile.

This morning I got an e-mail from Terri. She is a really good friend who I hardly know at all but once gave me a phone number that changed my entire life and saved me from years of personal struggle. Yay for Terri, right? Yesterday I returned the favor with a phone number to share a few words of encouragement. She wrote back to tell me how much I inspired her which in turn, inspires me to work harder and do better.

That made me smile.

One of my bosses brought me back a coffee and left it on my desk as a thank you for ..showing up every day I guess? Who knows.. but it made me smile.

List of little things that make me smile

The above picture of my kitchen window.

Lots of compliments on my new curtains!

The comforting knowledge that life goes on.

Knee high socks worn to bed.

Catching a friend in her office by accident and wasting a good 40 minutes chatting.

Shopping for a party dress. (I got one and I love it!)

Being asked how my day was.

Being told I need to get shiny-ed up.

A random offer of “Happy Friday!”

2 o’clock green tea.

Frank Sinatra.

NPR coming in all day long

Jazz after dark

And blog comments!

So I urge you, today, and tomorrow, to pay attention to the little things. Notice when a stranger smiles at you and smile at the stranger who frowns. Our actions are like ripples in a still, clear pond. They create change, no matter how small. Notice all the little things today and tell me what makes you smile?

In response...

2009-11-06T17:27:00.002-05:00

My friend (may I call you my friend, William?) William writes a blog called Will for Words. I most recall him from the fifth grade, when he used to wear very high waisted pants and horizontal striped shirts and had really neat hair, perfectly feathered every day. I do not think he liked me very much then but I forgive him his gross lack of judgment.. I was kind of a mess that year.

William recently wrote a reactionary blog about relationships and parenting and other things that made me want to call him up and start talking and explaining and sighing. Instead.. I wrote down all the things his blog made me think and with his permission I am reprinting his post along with my interjections, here.

Over the last few days the posts, real and virtual, of various friends has left me thinking. From many different backgrounds and widely varying circumstances we come, but one thread connects us all. We all are divorced. We all have children we happily devote our lives to. And to a person, not one of us has found the new relationship that we have sought and expected since taking our first new steps out into the world, newly single.

I’m not pessimistic by nature, but after almost as many years divorced as I was married, my perspective has evolved somewhat. My own experience has showed me that either the person I’m with may have trouble understanding their role (or lack thereof) in my children’s lives, or I may not be willing to give enough of myself to them. See, to give yourself to another person, another adult, at least in my mind, means you have to hold something in reserve from your children. They can’t have everything you have to give if you’re giving it to someone else. I’m not referring to some kind of codependent relationship between parents and children, either. All of the people I know—myself included—have healthy, well-developed personalities and independent aspects to the self, separate from their role and self-image as parents and caregivers to their children (don’t try the Dr. Phil junk here, I’ve got a degree in this—literally).

I disagree with the idea that to give yourself to another person is too with hold something from your children. Sadly, I am coming to realize I may be in the minority here.. and everywhere. I left my husband in 2000. Nearly 10 years ago. While our divorce took 6 years to be finalized I have been single for nearly 10 years. I dated here and there but I did not dip my toe into the pool of commitment because I thought, like William and many others do, that to do so was to take something away from my children.

In the past year I have come to realize that I was wrong and, in fact, was not only wrong but my romantic avoidance was more harmful to my children then beneficial. I did not give my children ‘my all’ because I was not the best person I could have been. I was lonely, I lacked support, I had no one to turn to at the end of the day and say “You will never guess what happened today”. I probably, by default, leaned on my children to be that person far too often. Anyone who has met my oldest son can see that he is a mature responsible young man and while that is a great thing.. sometimes I wonder if he has missed out. By focusing too much on them.. did I rob them of their chance to see a healthy relationship? Did I steal away a more carefree childhood? What family dynamic will they have as Fathers when they have no examples to draw from. From the men who have been in their lives and mine they have known divorce, deceit and disappointment. Is this really what is best?

For the record.. I do believe kids need a father figure and I am aware my children mostly lack one and that too has to play a part in my romantic life. Everyone is potentially their role model.

Sometimes it’s not you, though. Sometimes it’s them. In that case I find friends with partners (and I use that term loosely, in some cases) who are unwilling or unable to act in an adult manner becoming of a parent. It’s not always their fault. Being a parent is no easy task, and many people (most?) are ill-equipped for it. If you happen to be in a relationship with a partner who has children, you even lack the benefit of having been there from the beginning. It’s a hard road to walk. Of course, some of you just make crappy choices in partners and it is their fault. But let’s not cast aspersions.

With this I do agree. Have you ever been told what a great parent you are? You smile and blush but inside you feel like a fraud. You know you shouted at your kids over breakfast and you secretly wished for a moment that you were not there, not a parent, not responsible for the dishes, the homework, the bills. Parents have such a hard time being less then perfect but.. does perfect parenting really benefit our children? Are we setting up impossible examples? Why is it wrong to want to get the hell out of dodge now and then? Why is it so wrong to want adult companionship and to want to share your life and your children with a partner? Why can’t we just forgive ourselves for our choices? Why do we punish ourselves and then say it's good for our children? Since when are unhappy, sad parents good for anyone?

As a parent dating is a whole new ball game. It is no longer enough for a guy to be cute and charming. I need to know facts. I need to know if he has a good job, if he is reliable, if he is short tempered, if he likes Saturday morning soccer games and is he patient. Because I have kids that I need to think of. Parents do not get to date for fun like you do before kids.

I think.. I think it is best to be friends with as many people as you can and hope that somewhere among all of your wonderful friends who you already like.. someone clicks. I think I’d like to take the dating equation out of the picture actually. Lets all just.. go about friending and then see if one day someone gives you goose bumps when they walk into a room and you have one of those little moments of.. “oh! Look at the potato masher! I think my hand will fit just right around it’s handle!”

What does all this boil down to? Well, apart from my rambling and inability to structure a clear thought here, it leaves me with the question “is it possible?” Is it possible to start again? Really? I want to believe it is, I really do. I think deep down I do believe it. But I can’t believe it is as easy or as natural or—let’s be honest—as likely as conventional wisdom would have us believe. The Brady Bunch gave everyone of my generation some thoroughly silly ideas about marrying families, and the only time it becomes really clear just how silly that was, is when you look at how twisted all the cast members were and are.

It is possible. People do it all the time but we have to be ready to admit how hard it is and will be. We have to be prepared for the anger, hurt and jealously of our ex’s and our children and.. most damaging, ourselves. You have to be willing to work for it. On the same token we must be more careful, we must consider the repercussions of our actions before we make decisions that will hurt someone and in these situations someone will always get hurt. You have to be ready to be there to hold them and love anthem and work though the hurt together.

I still believe in the fantasy of starting over (at least in my personal relationships) with someone new, reaping the benefit of my knowledge, perspective and experience gleaned from years of work, triumph and failure. At least I want to. But more and more I find myself asking questions about what else I will have to give up, what more sacrifice will be needed to keep the ship afloat and on course. Is there really another chance on the horizon? Or has that opportunity passed me by? Has it passed us all by? I don’t envision a life of solitude and melancholy, and I’m not preparing myself to start a new career as a hermit (right now). I am, however, questioning the dream I have been sold about how second chances will largely resemble first chances but with fewer painful lessons to learn this time around.

We all have those fears. For me personally I was afraid that I would be unable to share myself with another adult after 9 years of carefully not sharing. Even the thimble full of relationships I did have I kept at arms length. While none of what I have written here is directly about my most recent failed attempt at romantic happiness .. I must admit I am glad it happened. I am really glad I went though that (and happily surprised to find myself using a past tense already!) because now I know.. I can share. Now I know that I didn’t lose the ability to care deeply for another adult and still love my children. Now I know that my emotional happiness only added to their lives and took nothing, at all, away from them. Now.. I know.

With any luck, time and fate will prove my fears largely unfounded, and we’ll all find ourselves standing around a lavishly appointed kitchen in expensive clothing, a perfect ethnically diverse group reflecting the precise demographics of the nation, sipping wine and trading bon mots as we cook dinner for our trendy adults-night-in, drowning in our own witty reparté, just like a wine commercial. But at the moment I’m having a little trouble seeing how we’re all supposed to get there.

In my version there is a board game of questionable age and stacks of dusty books and my own clothing, at least, is charmingly second hand but sweet and there will be at least one good natured political argument which will be quickly remedied by another glass of wine and the offering of a well frosted cupcake.

All mashed up

2009-10-23T17:10:00.002-04:00

“At the temple, there is a poem called "Loss" carved into the stone. It has three words, but the poet has scratched them out…You cannot read loss, only feel it." — Arthur Golden (Memoirs of a Geisha) ...

Loss is a tiny word. It is often lightly used. Today I feel a loss heavily, heavier then I think I can handle. I know I will handle it because that’s what you do. You pick up the broken shards, quietly wrap them in a soft blue cloth and tuck them away for when you are older and wiser and can look back and chuckle at yourself. Even though you think that day will never come.

This is the kind of loss that will ripple into every inch of my life. It will affect me at work and at home. It will change the dynamic with some of my friends, it has hurt my children.

I lost a potato masher. He had a better one so when I was making my annual winter applesauce I tossed my newer cruddy one and replaced it with his older but better one. I remember how I felt when I used it. A little bit sneaky because I had not asked and it was not mine. Content.. because I was sharing my space, my life and my kitchen utensils with someone I loved.

Turns out that the potato masher will never be mine. I am not allowed to use it to make applesauce or mashed turnips. The sweet potato pie at my small sad thanksgiving table will be from a box this year. I won’t be buying a new masher. It won’t be the same. There is a measuring cup too, that I will miss and several paintings I was rather fond of. The slightly spicy yet commercial scent of edge shave gel in the shower.

I will miss the word we. I had not realized how tired I was of the word I.

The whole thing, in reality, was very brief. Kind of like a flash fire. Two flammable objects meet, touch and then explode. Then someone else, who has no place being there, douses one of them with water and all you have left is a little tiny sad fire with no potato masher.

Suddenly I am reminded of the value of things. How precarious my college education is and how quickly I will lose it. Suddenly I am confronted with the very real possibility of being in a situation that causes poverty again. Suddenly I have to worry about heating oil versus food again. I preach a lot about poverty and how we are all one paycheck away from being there. It is easy for me to prattle on about the injustices heaped upon the poor when I am no longer one of them. Today I have to accept I may slide back there again.. more quickly then I can deal with.

I am also reminded of how strong I can be and have been in the past. I am reminded of other mistakes I have made and how I crawled up out of those too. I will take this and learn from it. I will wallow over my loss and I will cry and vent and I will mourn. Every time I see a potato masher I will feel my cheeks get hot with fresh hurt. I will keep my head held high, even if I am walking in a swamp. I will throw myself back into work and school. I will concentrate on the causes that have meaning for me. I will make dates with my friends and I will probably drink too much wine. Eventually I will look at another potato masher and smile and think.. “Gosh it would be nice to make applesauce with that masher there.”

But it will never be the same

Banned Books

2009-09-11T12:09:00.003-04:00

No matter who you are, no matter where you live, and no matter how many people are chasing you, what you don't read is often as important as what you do read."
— Lemony Snicket

I was recently talking a handsome man about books, something more people should make a habit out of, specifically banned books. We were looking at the lesser known artwork of Dr. Seuss, which is creepy. It's not creepy because of the subject matter really but creepy because it is Dr. Seuss art depicting rape, pool playing and covered faces. Something about a covered face really makes me squirmy. This one is pretty tame, I didn't want to shock people.

I had a point, I promise.

Books. I mentioned the banned Dr. Seuss book and he confessed (much to his chagrin) that he did not know about it but I could not recall the name of it.

It was The Lorax and was not banned everywhere and is no longer banned anywhere, I believe but once upon a time.. someone thought The Lorax was evil. Can guess who or why?

Children's writer/illustrator Theodor Seuss Geisel, most known by his pen name Dr. Seuss, created an imaginary cast of characters in his book The Lorax. It was written in 1971 on the heels of forest industry bad press on environmental issues unfolding in the United States' Pacific Northwest dealing with the Northern spotted owl and the health of coastal redwoods and Douglas firs. It influenced children's (and parents) environmental perceptions for decades.

At the end of September is Banned Books Week. The banning of any books offends me no matter the subject.

List of banned books by governments

An unofficial list of banned books, not complete. I made the ones I have read .. red. How many have you read? How many WILL you read?

Books Banned at One Time or Another in the United States

A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
Annie on My Mind by Nancy Garden
As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner
Blubber by Judy Blume
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
Canterbury Tales by Chaucer
Carrie by Stephen King
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
Christine by Stephen King
Confessions by Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Cujo by Stephen King
Curses, Hexes, and Spells by Daniel Cohen
Daddy's Roommate by Michael Willhoite
Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Peck
Death of a Salesman by Arthur Miller
Decameron by Boccaccio
East of Eden by John Steinbeck
Fallen Angels by Walter Myers
Fanny Hill (Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure) by John Cleland
Flowers For Algernon by Daniel Keyes
Forever by Judy Blume
Grendel by John Champlin Gardner
Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling
Have to Go by Robert Munsch
Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
Impressions edited by Jack Booth
In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
It's Okay if You Don't Love Me by Norma Klein
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
Lady Chatterley's Lover by D.H. Lawrence
Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman
Little Red Riding Hood by Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
Love is One of the Choices by Norma Klein
Lysistrata by Aristophanes
More Scary Stories in the Dark by Alvin Schwartz
My Brother Sam Is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
My House by Nikki Giovanni
My Friend Flicka by Mary O'Hara
Night Chills by Dean Koontz
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
One Day in The Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn
One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey
One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Ordinary People by Judith Guest
Our Bodies, Ourselves by Boston Women's Health Collective
Prince of Tides by Pat Conroy
Revolting Rhymes by Roald Dahl
Scary Stories 3: More Tales to Chill Your Bones by Alvin Schwartz
Scary Stories in the Dark by Alvin Schwartz
Separate Peace by John Knowles
Silas Marner by George Eliot
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
Tarzan of the Apes by Edgar Rice Burroughs
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
The Bastard by John Jakes
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
The Color Purple by Alice Walker
The Devil's Alternative by Frederick Forsyth
The Figure in the Shadows by John Bellairs
The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood (I read this in High School BECAUSE they banned it)The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Snyder
The Learning Tree by Gordon Parks
The Living Bible by William C. Bower
The Merchant of Venice by William Shakespeare
The New Teenage Body Book by Kathy McCoy and Charles Wibbelsman
The Pigman by Paul Zindel
The Seduction of Peter S. by Lawrence Sanders
The Shining by Stephen King
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The Witches of Worm by Zilpha Snyder
Then Again, Maybe I Won't by Judy Blume
To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare
Webster's Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary by the Merriam-Webster Editorial Staff
Witches, Pumpkins, and Grinning Ghosts: The Story of the Halloween Symbols by Edna Barth

Recycled Rambling

2009-09-05T19:26:00.003-04:00

Little guys fall allergies are kicking his butt. He just fell asleep at 7:30.

The kids downstairs are firing guns. At least it sounds like they are.

One of my cats keeps trying to eat my hair.

Big guy took off to see the PawSox game and will be gone until tomorrow.

I did not go to Yoga so I could wait for a text and now realize I should have gone to yoga.

I like eating ice cream in the sun even if I can only eat a tiny bit and I feel groggy for an hour afterwards.

I could trade a bath tub for high ceilings.

I can learn how to install shelving.

I need new winter shoes.

I spend to much time on FaceBook.

Kimmy A was an awesome friend to have growing up. I wish we had not grown apart. I wish I had worked harder to keep her.. grounded.

Chip clips are over rated. Yea I did say it!

Pumpkin beer is also over rated.

Librarians are awesome.

You should blog more.

I should enjoy this down time while i have it.

Good Night Blogosphere.

First Day of School

2009-09-01T22:07:00.004-04:00

It wasn’t so long ago that I was in middle school, was it? I remember it like it was last week. My keds that I drew little hearts and flowers on, side ponytails and extra large bangs, day glo socks that matched my shirt perfectly. I remember passing notes, folding them up into tiny perfect footballs. I remember pegged jeans tucked into those awesome day glo socks. Off the shoulder shirts (so daring!). I remember school dances at Peck Junior High. I remember hot dogs at Nicks Nest. I remember Community field, my first kiss, Chamura pool with April and Kimmy. I remember the triangle, the stream, the bridge, Old Jarvis, the back way to HCC. I took sewing in grade 7.. which I gloriously failed (Who knew pillows were so dang hard!) I remember 1988 like it was last week.

Today I dropped my oldest off for his first day of grade 7. I never saw a more handsome seventh grader, have you? Of course you haven’t.

Thanks kid, for the clothesline. Thanks for finding my key, thanks for grabbing my coffee mug but most of all.. thanks for kissing me goodbye even though all your friends could see.

I also dropped off my little guy for fifth grade. On the first day of my fifth grade Ms. Laliberty, at Sullivan School, said to us.. “I don’t want to hear that you can’t remember your times tables and then see you turn around and sing the Top 40!” That woman was terrifying. Seriously. I sucked at math.. but knew all the lyrics to all the top 40 songs. My little guy is just the same as I was. But infinitely more adorable, you agree of course.

He got a wonderful teacher this year and even though I often want to switch schools for him, I won’t now that he has her. I know she ‘fits’ his personality well. For my little guy having a teacher who ‘gets’ him is important, if he feels uncomfortable he cannot learn.

In grade 5 I hit puberty.. I hit it exceptionally hard to tell the truth. I hope his launch into the world of body hair and funky odors is much less horrifying then mine was. I hope the girls are nice to him. I hope he doesn’t get picked on. I hope that when he does get picked on he stands up for himself. I hope he gets at least one really good friend in his class this year.

I hope that my shouting at the office staff this morning doesn’t get held against my kids. I know I probably shouldn’t have done that but you know.. Motherhood happens

Nice things

2009-07-30T17:27:00.003-04:00

Nice things.

Heard.

"Thank you, for being you."

"That bracelet is really.. you."
(This may not have been nice but I am taking it that way)

"I'm sorry Mom."

"Hi! How are you?" And they really wanted to know.

Said.

"I missed you." And I did, I really did.

"I have a quarter." To the woman who was short to pay for her milk in the line before me.

"I'm sorry too."

"You look so pretty today."

Promises.

To little guy.
I promise to focus more on how incredible you are and less on how much you are not like me. I tend to forget that what I see as imperfections are really the best parts of you that I have yet to understand. You are amazing, even when I don’t see.. maybe mostly when I do not see. I promise to spend more time and energy fostering your love of history and teaching you more about maps.

To big guy.
I promise to explain more. I have reasons for what I say, I always mean well, I always think (or at least hope) I am making the right choice. You did not come with instructions and sometimes you are smarter then I am. Thank you for trying so hard to understand. I will always return the favor.

To me.
I promise to shut up and enjoy it more. All of it. Them, him, you. I promise to worry less and breath more. I promise to say yes more. I promise to share more. I promise to write more poems and maybe let you see them. I promise to let others make mistakes without my attempts to stop them because I know, I know.. you need to make them yourself to understand why I so badly want to stop you.

I promise to be more fancy.. and less fancy all at once.

I promise to walk from my house to downtown at least once in the next seven days. When I get down there, I promise to buy whoever I've dragged with me an ice cream and then sit in the park and listen to all the nice things they have heard and said.

And most of all, in this moment... I promise to let it happen, I promise to hold your hand, I promise not to ask too many 'what if' questions. I promise to love you, all of you.

I haven't forgotten

2009-07-23T19:50:00.003-04:00

Someone mentioned my Gramma today. You have to say it that way too, Gramma. There is no n or d in her name. I miss her. I miss her in all the corny ways people miss each other in pretty songs and Meg Ryan movies. Except that there is no happy ending. She died in 2001, I think. I found out in 2006. We had fallen out of touch because she could no longer read my letters and I had children, a marriage, a divorce, a job and a million other things that really, in hindsight, were never as important as picking up the phone would have been. I found out because my letter was returned. Her house had been bulldozed. I would have sold my soul to have bought that rickety little house on the lake.

But I know she forgives me, because Gramma always forgives.

Her house smelled of my late grandfather’s pipe and it was filled with his wooden mallard ducks. The Lincoln logs were his and given to my father who never understood just how magical they were. They were my link to my Grandfather who loved me like sunshine in his pocket. I was too little to get much when he died, I don’t remember it. But I do remember driving back to Mass from Florida when I was 5 and suddenly feeling the weight of his loss. I was so inconsolable and so unable to find five year old words to tell my pissed off mother what was wrong that she pulled over and got out of the car and walked away for a while. I really don’t blame her.

My Gramma used to read readers digest magazine, or rather we would all read it to her. After I was 5 and we left New York for good I only saw her every few years but every time I did it was like we had been together all along. I’d read to her from readers digest and she would bake cookies even though she could barely see. Her kitchen was and is, the seat of my heart. If I ever have a daughter I'd want to name her Pauline for my Gramma.

I don’t even know how she died and I know there is someone I could ask but what if I don’t want to know? I want to think she died peacefully in her bed, surrounded by the millions of photographs she kept and her jewelry that, no matter how plastic and cheesy, I always thought was so glamorous and fine. I don’t know what happens to a person’s soul when you die. My son thinks your soul gets recycled. But I want to believe that somewhere, in new bodies or ethereal space.. My Gramma and Grampa are sitting somewhere in a little lopsided house on the lake, her in the kitchen reading a readers digest and he in that mallard duck nook smoking a pipe. And somewhere nearby is all my three year old happy, saved up in a pocket just for them.

Happy Birthday

2009-07-16T14:55:00.002-04:00

Birthdays are weird. The subject of them is stressful. They are not my favorite. Last year on my birthday I argued with my children about how old I was. I thought I was 33, a little quick math revealed I was mistaken, I was only 32. That’s how much I normally pay attention to my own birthday.

The boys both have holiday birthdays and that too, is stressful. Those birthdays are fun, I enjoy them even if they do make me a little sad. We have big parties at pizza places without absolutely any organization. No silly games or set times. People come and go and drop off cards and kisses. I like things like that.

I.. do not have birthday parties. I recall my fifth birthday party, in our backyard. My cousins were there and my mother’s boyfriend got really drunk and loud and I got a Holly Hobby sewing kit with a doll. Best. Birthday. Ever.

When I turned 11 I had a Mexican party. I wore a red dress and red shoes my mother had bought special and our neighbor Kim came and smoked over the cake and then I didn’t want to eat any. My friend Letty ate 4 large bowls of popcorn and then threw up in the white plastic terrarium. She had never had popcorn before. Yea.

When I was 16, in a bout of guilt over some nameless thing, my mother again threw me a party. I used to have a picture of that party, I was wearing a plaid ruffled shirt with a v neck and laces like a corset(shut up that shirt was AWESOME) and blue jeans tucked into my socks. My Aunt D and I were sipping soda and laughing really hard in that picture. I wish I still had it.

And that was it. When I turned 21 I had a six month old baby and a husband I didn’t like very much. He went to work before I woke up that day and came home after I was asleep. The baby and I had thrush. It was one of the most miserable days of my life.

Today is my birthday again and I am thirty three, roughly, and with a little luck, one third of my life is over. I didn’t do so bad. I have some giant gaping holes where I did the wrong thing.. but when set beside all the right things I did, they do not look so bad. My children took their ‘life savings’ and bought me a book about wraps, you know.. sandwiches without crusts? and pretty silver earrings I wouldn’t have bought myself. Most of my relatives, no matter how much space we have let fall between us, paused to say happy birthday. At work I got a card and a balloon and a gift too corny to mention. They bought a cake and everyone sang. Suddenly I like my birthday. I have friends and family and co-workers that for all their strange little twitches and sigh worthy moments.. I would not trade for anything.

The day is only half over but I do not think, in any way, it could possibly get any better.

Wicked proud

2009-07-14T13:34:00.002-04:00

Last night the big kid sat on the couch, took up the whole couch with his sprawl actually, and turned on the TV. I was sitting at the kitchen table and watching a squirrel crack his head on a gravestone. We could hear all the other kids outside shrieking and laughing and catcalling. I was suddenly filled with a sense of.. time and how fast it passes.

My oldest son, you know the one who think he is the smartest thing to ever walk this earth? He used to called pharmacy’s..

Para-Mack-e’s

The little one once walked into the kitchen and declared that he knew where babies come from. I asked him, cautiously, where…

“From Virginia!”

When they were very little I once dropped the cordless phone into a pot of boiling spaghetti after a long and very bad day. I sat down on the floor with my back against the cabinet and cried. The older kid came over, crawled into my lap and promised to make everything okay again. And by doing that.. he did.

How did he go from sitting in my lap to rudely occupying the entire couch with his impossibly long limbs? How come they both comb their own hair now? When did they start not only liking Monty Python but actually getting the jokes? Why are we watching old black and white horror movies and I am the only one jumping at the scary bits?

Excuse me Mr. Time but I think you stole ten years of my life. Where did you put it?! I want some of it back. I want to take more pictures. I want to go outside more, I want to buy more ice cream cones and chase more rainbows. Because suddenly I am sitting in the kitchen alone and no one, at all, wants to color with me.

I am not sure I know these two miniature men. They sleep with their doors shut. They demand male products like green soap and deodorant that promises to make women love you. They shake new peoples hands without my prompting anymore and they check the mail on their own. They only kiss me if I ask. They blush if I touch them in public. They have come to realize my knowledge of everything great and good is woefully inferior to theirs and they make their own mac and cheese.

I am becoming obsolete.. Except that I can drive and I control the cash flow.

Now and then I catch a glimpse of them that slows down time, puts things back where I want them. Last night I heard them talking about me and what they got me for my birthday. They wanted to reuse an old gift bag because.. in the words of the little guy…

“That will make her wicked proud!”

and I am.

Libraries: The medicine chest of the soul

2009-07-13T13:40:00.002-04:00

There is a library in Thebes with an inscription over the door that reads “Libraries: The medicine chest of the soul.” Every time I walk into the Holyoke Public Library I try to remember that. I want to remind myself that I am bringing my children to a real, live, tangible wonderland. We always go in the back door and take the elevator up to the first floor. We walk gingerly over the glass floor and then boisterously say hello to whoever is behind the desk. Thank goodness for understanding Librarians. We drop off whatever we are returning, perhaps renew a few longer reads and then I let my kids loose on Jason, the Gatekeeper of the Children’s section. Jason Lefebvre has been there as long as we have been frequenting the HPL and has become an extension of our personal community. My kids share with him their latest favorite books and movies, accomplishments at school and have even volunteered their time reshelving books with him. These are experiences I do not think we could have anywhere else. I have lived in other towns and frequented other Library’s but HPL will always be my favorite.

Perhaps that will help you understand why I was so shocked and disturbed by the recent sensationalized media coverage seen on CBS 3. Something terrible did happen last December at the Holyoke Library, while it was extremely unfortunate the offense was reported and the perpetrator caught....] The offense was discovered on a Friday and was reported on Monday morning. I agree it should have been reported immediately and, I agree it was a terrible crime but no one was harmed by this delay and I refuse to allow irresponsible reporting to incite me or my family to hysteria. The man in question was swiftly identified and apprehended. He has had his day in court and the Holyoke Police Department and Court System have made swift work of the matter and the people of Holyoke are grateful that this man will not be able to actually harm a child. I hope Library patrons and Holyoke Citizens keep in mind that computers and the internet have been freely used in Libraries across the country for at least a decade and the accessing of such illegal photographs is a national problem.

This was an isolated incident and I have been to the Library as a concerned parent, I have discussed my concerns with staff there. Unlike the news story recently aired, I actually asked about what measures are being taken to prevent this sort of thing from happening again. From what I understand, the Library is working on revamping the infrastructure of the computers' security and on training staff on how to respond to such an event in the future. I would like to mention as well that any Library patron found to be abusing the libraries free internet will not be welcomed back again. While this incident was unfortunate it was, I really must repeat, isolated.

The vicious and shameful reporting we have seen only serves to hurt the children of Holyoke whose parents may now be wary of the library. Parents will be frightened to allow their children there. A public Library is one of the greatest resources of any city or town and so irresponsibly try to damage or smear or inflict harm on its reputation is simply criminal.

Where else can our children go, at no cost, to be entertained, to fall in love with literature, to borrow movies, music and quite simply, absorb culture? My own children have grown as thoughtful human beings thanks, in large part, to the library. From the Holyoke Public Library I have learned about local events, my children learned how to play chess, I learned to cook Indian food, I studied anything that sparked my interest, my children learned to love the humor of Lewis Carroll, Lemony Snicket and to fall into the world of Spiderwick. We all became Harry Potter fans and experts on how to use the search feature on the computers. My children joined a book club, took water color painting and learned the dewey decimal system. I've listened to local writers and speakers and once spent an hour with the children’s Librarian as he happily helped me find all the books on my class list of about a hundred titles. I can assure you that very few librarians would be so helpful and unrushed.

I am a single working parent in Holyoke, I am active in various local groups, it is important to me to expose my children to all kinds of events and culture and literature. I am also a part time student at HCC. For all of those parts of our every day lives the Library has been an invaluable resource. I would hate to see another family lose the same opportunities due to the manipulative fear mongering and sensationalist reporting of the news media. This Holyoke family will not stand for it.

Thank you,
Just Another Holyoke Mom

Dear Jerk,

2009-07-09T20:29:00.002-04:00

Dear Stop and Shop Parking Lot guy,

I'm totally not a prude and I am a terrible feminist. I actually grinned when you whistled at me from your truck even if I didn't look back. There was probably a little extra swagger in my step too. I worked pretty hard to look like I do, I don't mind that being noticed.

What I do freaking mind was your persistence. I did not look back, you did not see that I grinned. Do you have any women in your family? Would you want some dirty guy who couldn't be bothered to wash his hands after work to be checking out any of them and calling them a sexy bitch in a public parking lot?

I kept walking. That's a clue. I always park really far away because I like the long walk.. but thanks to you next time I will think twice. That walk never seemed so long. I am not yours to objectify and really, until you brush your goddamn teeth you really shouldn't open your mouth. I think your polluting, seriously.

As I started my car I saw a woman get in your truck. Was that your wife? Was that your toddler she was dragging by the arm as he screamed for more candy? Did you forget to buy her the bottom half of that dress? I am really sure there was supposed to be some kind of skirt. I wanted to go and tell her what a pig you are. How disrespectful you are to women. And when I imagined you interrupting me (probably telling me to shut the fuck up you stupid bitch, cause that kind of abuse is all over your face) from her enlightenment, I imagined putting my palm up and in your face without even looking at you. But.. she probably already knows, doesn't she?

I heard your mirror move, by the way, you should use some WD-40 for that before you go parking lot stalking again. You left a nasty taste in my mouth. It tasted like oil and grease and dirty sand. You made me feel.. out of place and uncomfortable in the worst kind of way. You made me feel like it was my fault.

I hope one day someone's husband sees you do that crap and kicks the last of your teeth in. I hope it's caught on a cell phone and posted to You Tube and I hope I see it so I can play it over and over again while I drink wine and eat popcorn.

Signed,
Pink Sweater.

And while I was not wearing a short skirt I was strongly reminded of this poem.

My Short Skirt
(from The Vagina Monologues)

My short skirt
is not an invitation
a provocation
an indication
that I want it
or give it
or that I hook

My short skirt
is not begging for it
it does not want you
to rip it off me
or pull it down.

My short skirt
is not a legal reason
for raping me
although it has been before
it will not hold up
in the new court.

My short skirt, believe it or not
has nothing to do with you.

My short skirt
is about discovering
the power of my lower calves
about cool autumn air traveling
up my inner thighs
about allowing everything I see
or pass or feel to live inside.

My short skirt is not proof
that I am stupid
or undecided
or a malleable little girl.

My short skirt is my defiance
I will not let you make me afraid
My short skirt is not showing off
this is who I am
before you made me cover it
or tone it down.
Get used to it.

My short skirt is happiness
I can feel myself on the ground.
I am here. I am hot.

My short skirt is a liberation
flag in the women’s army
I declare these streets, any streets
my vagina’s country.

My short skirt
is turquoise water
with swimming colored fish
a summery festival
in the starry dark
a bird calling
a train arriving in a foreign town
my short skirt is a wild spin
a full breath
a tango dip
my short skirt is
initiation
appreciation
excitation.

But mainly my short skirt
and everything under it
is Mine.
Mine.
Mine.

—Eve Ensler, 2001

Why do you Love Holyoke?

2009-07-03T22:53:00.003-04:00

Nice things I heard lately.

"You have some talents there!"

"I washed your Yoga pants Mom"

"That sandwich was really good!"

"You should write more."

So I am writing more. I should write more, I like writing. I feel somewhat uncomfortable being very personal here which is weird right? Because on Face Book I once had a status that included my bra size.

I deleted it, stop looking.

My life in Holyoke is.. not like my life was in any other town I ever lived in. Nor like it was in New York, or Florida. In Holyoke I feel connected. I feel like I could go outside and put my palm on the pavement and feel the pulse of Holyoke. Holyoke has a personality, she has a flirty smile. She has strong reassuring hands. Apparently she has a gender.

Not so long ago I was out with a friend and someone mentioned Holyoke. My spine straightened and I turned slightly towards the speaker and began to extol the virtues of Holyoke. My companion laughed and said "Look how she just lit up." That guy will never know how much that sentence meant to me. I like to have my passions noticed. And I am passionate about Holyoke.

I tried to leave Holyoke once, I moved to a 'better' town with a 'better' school system. I had affluent friends (though I have major issues with the idea of affluence in America as our poorest family on welfare is still richer then the richest African farm worker, but anyway) and my kids got good grades. One day.. I realized that there were no minority children in either of my kids classes. They had no exposure to other languages or culture.

Dear God, I was raising Wonder Bread boys!

Luckily this realization coincided with the loss of my job and a small mental breakdown.. I had a lot of realizations at the same time and then had three TERRIBLE weeks that involved a house fire, a liar, a thief, my ex husbands couch, a Chicopee school and finally.. a crappy apartment in Holyoke.

Where else could I have gone? I was jobless and had made myself friendless. I lacked direction, I lacked self esteem. But Holyoke didn't care, Holyoke welcomed me with open arms. Holyoke schools didn't care about the brand of clothing my kids wore or what I drove. My children began to learn Spanish! They went to birthday parties and ate unidentifiable foods. They tasted REAL beans and rice.. they learned to relax.

And slowly.. I did too. While I was looking for a work, a very long, slow, depressing year, I began to post on masslive and I met people like VanDog and HiesRN. My kids found scouting and soccer.. and I found the very thing I had been lacking all along.

Community.

I eventually found work, 40 minutes away but worth the daily drive. I began to work on myself, my health (After a nasty health scare and a little surgery) and my.. at the risk of sounding dramatic, my soul.

Over the last 2 years I have made some wonderful amazing friends in Holyoke.. there are simply too many list and I am too frightened to leave anyone out. You all know who you are. We have eaten together, walked together, had wine together. With some of you I have begun my Yoga journey (thank you!) and with some of you I feel the desire to understand photography grow. We have discussed local politics, libraries and public schools. You have shaken hands with my children and made us all grin a little more.

That's what Holyoke means to me. A family of acceptance. A community desperately reaching out to everyone. A welcoming fold. A gentle wing.

Tomorrow when I go outside I will put my hand to the ground and close my eyes and remember all of that and I will smile. Ask me again why I love Holyoke and I will tell you the truth.

Because Holyoke loves me.

Dear Mike

2009-05-13T13:29:00.001-04:00

Here is a copy of your post to me at Masslive..

I try to stay away from getting into arguements... goes with my positive energy v negative energy theory, but once again I have a little time to kill so may I please ask a few basic questions:
1. Is it the law that you can only sit in Holyoke and criticize people, or can anyone do it from anywhere?

"You sat your oversized McDonalds eating a$$ right next to him and THEN proceeded to yank your snotty smelly kid in the 2 inches of space between you and my polite son."

2. Just how much do you enjoy being poor?

http://plasticrevolution.blogspot.com/2008/12/being-poor.html

3. Exactly how long can one leave Holyoke and stay away before they are legally banned from returning?

4. Who do you think will be the last person left in Holyoke with a real job?

5. How many more buildings do you want to see boarded up in downtown?

6. How many buildings would you like to see un-boarded?

7. How many jobs do you want at minimum wage to satisfy the requirements of getting more welfare into that city?

8. Who works for who? Do you work for the state or does the state work for you?

"A new study shows a sales tax hike would save state jobs at the expense of the private sector."

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2009/05/massachusetts_sales_tax_hike_a.html

1st paragraph says it all...

"A 25 percent increase in the state sales tax would wipe out around 12,000 jobs in the private sector but save more than 6,000 jobs in state and local government, according to a new study."

9. How many heroin dealers are you willing to tolerate?

10. How many prostitutes are you willing to tolerate?

11. How many more jobs do you think raising the tax rates even higher will create?

12. How many do you think it will destroy and drive out of town permanately?

13. When was the last time you really felt safe walking downtown?

Now let me make this perfectly clear, I have done more for Holyoke in the last 6 months than the Mayor or City Council has done in the last 6 years and you don't have a clue as to what it is I have done. Now Thursday I will be meeting the Tony Hawk foundation to convince them to donate funds and design a skate park for your boys.

Final question... should I cancel the meeting? (I recommend you ask your boys first before answering.)

Enjoy your day.

Mike McCarthy

Here are my replies.

Dude.. I have a job. So here is my brief reply.. by the way.. this was extremely rude and abrasive, you know that right?

1. Is it the law that you can only sit in Holyoke and criticize people, or can anyone do it from anywhere? This question makes no sense. That woman was a snotty bitch to my kid.. who was polite.
2. Just how much do you enjoy being poor?
Why are you linking to my posts and.. who told you I was poor, right now, today? And when I was poor.. it was NEVER your business.. pointing that out will only endear you to the right wing nuts you proclaim to hate so much. I’d back that up with one of your posts but I am not as motivated to cruelty as you are today. Thanks for the happy memories.
3. Exactly how long can one leave Holyoke and stay away before they are legally banned from returning?
47 and one third minutes. Duh.
4. Who do you think will be the last person left in Holyoke with a real job?
The mayor.
5. How many more buildings do you want to see boarded up in downtown?
Eleventy two
6. How many buildings would you like to see un-boarded?
I’d like to watch all of them, cause I have that much time.
7. How many jobs do you want at minimum wage to satisfy the requirements of getting more welfare into that city?
What is this question about and how the heck is it relevant to me? Or anyone? Since you have not SEEN the welfare situation here in like 20 years I don’t see how you can talk it all down.
8. Who works for who? Do you work for the state or does the state work for you?
Delete Delete
9. How many heroin dealers are you willing to tolerate?
4 per square mile.
10. How many prostitutes are you willing to tolerate?
Well they keep the menfolk outta trouble so..
11. How many more jobs do you think raising the tax rates even higher will create?
You like numbers too much.
12. How many do you think it will destroy and drive out of town permanently?
Everyone but me and then I can be the Queen and WIN. Ha!
13. When was the last time you really felt safe walking downtown?
This morning, seriously. And last night and tonight. Keep it up Kiddo I used to live on High Street. I picked up bullet casings in my parking lot. I am not ascared of the big bad 4 block city.

Lastly.. My kids aren’t big Tony Hawk fans since I keep them from most of the mainstream media. They could tell you about Poe or Hawkings though. If you want to impress them you won’t do it with your MTV knock off crud.

You have done more then the MAYOR? WOW! Holy shit that’s impressive yes it is! thank god for you Mike, I guess I can stop all *I* have done for Holyoke now that you are here to save the freaking DAY.
I will enjoy my day IN Holyoke,

Me!

PS.. this is how seriously I take this kind of attack.

Moving

2009-04-01T14:50:00.002-04:00

Were moving! So here are some really stupid pictures that make me laugh. Consider a sense of humor test.

So rude.

2009-03-23T09:08:00.000-04:00

Dear rude woman,

Sometimes I wish I had raised my kids differently. When you said excuse me to my son as he and his friends sat on the curb at the parade he politely squished over against his friend to let you get by. But you didn’t go by.. You sat your oversized McDonalds eating ass right next to him and THEN proceeded to yank your snotty smelly kid in the 2 inches of space between you and my polite son. He still didn’t say anything, he just moved over more, squishing himself against his friend. When his friend’s mother pointed out that “He was sitting there.” You said.. and I quote.. “Well you ain’t moving my fucking kid.” Classy.
“Ain’t’ is not a proper word and using the f word just shows your gross lack of intelligent vocabulary.
My kid, the polite kid, got up and stood. His friends did too and you moved right into the space. Then you proceeded to try and stop the marchers to take photos of them with your kid. Lady.. It is not –your- parade, it is our parade.. stop screwing it up.
Then.. then! You told your kids to dump out the drinks they did not like and throw their cups on the ground.. now the sidewalk. Where people were sitting, was wet. Nice job. And covered in your McDonalds trash. I really hope you are not from Holyoke.
People like you make me wish I had raised my kid to be a little bit ruder. You know.. kind of like you and your kids. Good job.

Signed,
Mother with manners.

Just saying..

2009-03-20T08:55:00.002-04:00

I borrowed this from a newsletter I get. I'm not screaming my opinion, just sharing something to think about. Can any of us really stand to be spoon fed political propaganda?

A global warming science update, which can be summarized in seven short words – It is much worse than we thought.
Public opinion, which finds that a record 41% of the American people think the threat of global warming is being exaggerated.
• Economist Nicholas Stern believes that without urgent action, we could be committing ourselves to a planetary increase of four to six degrees Centigrade.
• Even at a more modest four degree rise, Stern predicts that 85% of the Amazon rainforest will be destroyed, leading to catastrophic shortages of fresh water and mass failures of food harvests. As many as half of all species on Earth may become extinct.
• A 2009 peer-reviewed study published in Science concludes that the planetary effects of Antarctic ice melt could lead to wildly uneven sea level increases. In the Northern hemisphere sea level increases as high as 21 feet may threaten New York, London, and Tokyo with total inundation -- creating tens of millions of refugees.

Denial and Deceit -- The Opposition
You'd think this terrifying wave of discoveries would galvanize all of us to take drastic action today.
Instead, we are witnessing an unprecedented propaganda blitz by polluters and global warming deniers to stop legislation and confuse the public. Consider these few highlights of what they're up to:
• They are spending hundreds of millions of dollars in lobbying, political contributions alone -- with hundreds of millions more in paid ads.
• The number of lobbyists working to block global warming action has increased 300% in recent years, according to the Center for Public Integrity.
• They've landed an army of talking heads on the political talk shows to drive the debate among the Beltway crowd. Their message is as simple as it is false. A cap on global warming pollution is a "hidden energy tax" (which it is not) and that "we can't afford to act in the current economic crisis" (which is not true).

Tech. Dif.

2009-03-18T08:55:00.002-04:00

One sick kid
Two essays on the effects of early slavery on todays economy
One story for 7 year olds
Two midterms that I have no time to study for
One fire in the attic
Two essays comparing poems for children and creative elasticity in childrens toys
One large bottle of Tylenol PM
Two dollars in my pocket

Me: Does my hair look like I brushed it?
Kid 1: You brush your hair?

Boss: So I took your advice and broke up with my girlfriend instead of cheating on her.
Me: Good for you! I think.. how did that go?
Boss: Well, I broke up with her via text message.
Me: ................

Me: I am have Thai pasta for lunch, 150 calories.
Erin: I can't eat pasta.
Me: This is GOOD for you pasta, it's rice noodles.. look.
-I took photos of my lunch with my phone and e-mailed them to her-
Erin: I don't know who is dorkier, you for sending me pics of your lunch or me for downloading them.
Me: -busy eating my pasta-

I stopped taking my iron pills and have been feeling like a truck ran me over.. I still have the Mi Plaza and Mt Tom pics to post but I can't find the stupid cable for my camera. My laptop has a sim card slot though so as soon as I get a chance I will try and upload them that way. I am dreading the parade.. I hope it isn't cold out.

While you wait...

2009-03-09T11:43:00.002-04:00

I have two posts in the works.. Mi Plaza and Mt Tom.. but for now I just have this..

The Armory
Sargeant & Pine Streets
Holyoke Mass.
Circa 1900

Birds Eye View of
High Street, Holyoke Mass.
Mount Holyoke in Distance
Circa 1910

The Nonotuck
Holyoke Mass.
Circa 1910

Things I would like to know..

2009-03-06T08:53:00.001-05:00

1. Why are all the lights along High St missing the delay between red for one street and green for the next? Why?!

2. Why did the Holyoke School Dept close down Lawrence to ‘save money’ and then not move there but still pay to heat and light the entire building? Hmm?

3. Why did Lisa Lavoie have mens jeans and greasy hair on her ‘perp walk’ into the Holyoke Police Department? Doesn’t West Virginia have showers? Are her clothes being saved as evidence? Does she actually dress like that? … that would explain a lot though, wouldn’t it?

4. Why doesn’t the McDonalds downtown pick up its freaking trash? And smile when I drive though. I love your new Mochas. You are single handedly destroying my illusions of being a health food nut. At least smile as I pay you to crush my dreams.

5. Why did the shop guy just hand me a dirty invoice? They have soap over there, I know because I bought it for them. Can no one take a hint?

6. On a happier note Kashi has instant oatmeal that is not overly sweetened and has 9 grams of protein a serving! Yay! And my boys will be taking a Yoga class Saturday morning with me, I kind of want to just watch and take pictures of them in Warrior pose, then frame them for their adorableness. Mike, don’t tell them I blogged about that!

7. Sunday is supposed to be delicious outside, I hope it won’t be too muddy to go walk around Mt Tom! Anyone want to come?

p.s. The best play ever a few posts back was West Side Story. I need to hunt down a new copy on Ebay.

Teaching kids about taxes!

2009-03-05T09:33:00.005-05:00

My son is on the Gold Star System. He gets gold stars for brushing his teeth and cleaning his toys up... And every week we take 25 % of his gold stars to teach him about taxes.

Four Degrees Hotter

2009-03-02T12:46:00.003-05:00

Boys came to work with me today, snow day. Thank god for having a big enough office that they don’t have to sit near each other and actually co-exist for 8 hours.

So I am reading this article about Global Warming.. I know it is a phrase I do not like but in this case it is actually what they are talking about. What will happen when the earth’s average temp climbs 4 degrees. It doesn’t sound like much, but you have to stop and think… At 32 degrees your freeze pop freezes. At 33 degrees you have kool aid in a tube.

The difference of one degree might as well be the difference of 100 degrees.

If the average temp rises 4 degrees New Orleans will no longer exist, Brazil will be a desert..

ALLIGATORS basking off the English coast; a vast Brazilian desert; the mythical lost cities of Saigon, New Orleans, Venice and Mumbai; and 90 per cent of humanity vanished. Welcome to the world warmed by 4 °C.

I know the article says 4C, I use Degrees because I was mceducated in ‘merican schools where we only spent 5 hours on the metric system and Celsius.

Now, I am not an alarmist and I don’t actually think that recycling and avoiding plastic will stop Climate Change. It is too late now, this is real, it’s happening. Some of us will still be alive to see this. All we can do now is try not to make it worse… use less, buy less, burn less. No one is asking you to turn into an environmentalist nut right this minute.. but bring your own bags once in a while, notice how much trash you create, maybe try a little compost project just for fun.

What we need to do now is prepare for the future.

On a more local note, it has been really uplifting lately to hear so much about Holyoke and our efforts to be a little greener, after all Holyoke has the potential to be the Greenest City in the state. Wouldn’t it be nice to be known for something other then crime, poverty and culture divides?

Mindless Chatter

2009-02-27T13:18:00.003-05:00

Hi! I’m here! How are you? I don’t have a pic for this mish mash post but I do have a pic from the Best Play Ever. Do you know it?

I went to the CRUSH meeting last night after yoga and had a really good time. I ran into a woman I used to work with years ago. I never really spoke to her much then, she was all about following rules and I was all about being lazy.

Lazy is all you get from me for min. wage. Plus my boss was a jerk.

Anyway, turns out she’s good people. I should have made more of an effort to befriend her then. Maybe it’s a sign I should chat with the weird girl I work with now.

Nahh.

The Crush meeting, I was saying, was fun. You should go to one. It’s in the Bungalow, which is just about the neatest little room I have ever seen in Holyoke and while I only actually knew 4 people there, everyone else was super nice. The speakers were nifty too, especially the slides that I didn’t really see because some people are really into themselves and forget the little people, literally, whose view they are blocking.
-ahem- just saying.

I did say Yoga! I recently joined Vega Yoga in Open Square and you should do that too. It’s more then ‘just a yoga studio’ it is a place to sort of.. reconnect with yourself. I don’t know about you, but by the end of my day I am lucky to know where my shoes are let alone my inner quiet.

I have to write a paper this weekend. I am either going to write a short story (Maybe about a girl who is scatterbrained?) or write a more serious review of The Golden Compass (the book, not the crappy film).

Tonight I am going to dance like a fool with Rachel, who looks infinitely cooler then I do, dancing like a fool.

Saturday is Birthday Parties and Basketball, during all of which I will be mentally writing that paper so I can type it up in an hour around midnight.

Sunday is Bubblemania at Holyoke Heritage State park, 2 pm. We have been to that before and it’s a fun little show.

Thanks Peter, for letting me use your phone. I was too embarrassed to have lost my phone in my own purse to even be envious of your model.

Oh! And before I forget, this will either make you laugh or gag.

.. this is why you’re fat.

Back!

2009-02-20T11:14:00.015-05:00

We spent a week in Florida with my Grandparents. I miss it already! Click on the pics for full view.

Sharing

2009-01-23T13:20:00.000-05:00

This blog…

http://www.notesfromthetrenches.com/

Is easily one of my favorites. It is not about Holyoke. I have no idea where the blogger lives but I am sure it is not Holyoke. She’s not especially green and her pics are often full of plastic items.

But I love this blog.

She takes fantastic photos. Mostly of her children, sometimes of bathroom mirrors, pies or pretty scenery. Once she posted about peeing in a jug and carrying it around and I laughed for ages after wards. I never comment at her blog or even read others comments and her bog has none of my interests in it but still.. You should look, even if just to admire her photography skills.

Twofer Tuesday, plus 3.

2009-01-06T09:01:00.001-05:00

Does anyone else think Miss Mass looks like a starving refugee? Can someone please give her a cheese burger?!

Anyway..

1. What the hell is with snow days and delays and people in New England freaking out about the weather? The last snow storm I recall being so bad that you couldn’t drive in it was in the 1990’s and I am a pretty timid driver!

I get the safety thing, I really do. Busses have no seat belts; kids have to walk to the bus stop. But.. Didn’t we all do it as kids? I not only walked in the snow but I have to take a Public Bus when I was 9! Both ways. (I sound like my grandmother.) We are raising a generation of fearful people. While I do not want to put my kids in any danger.. I do not want them to be afraid of the world. If you live in the northeast then wet and cold and icy weather IS your world.

If the buses are delayed why must the kids who are driven and/or walk have to be delayed? Can’t the delay be optional? Like.. Ok all the buses will be two hours late but for those of you who have to work to feed your kids can still drop them off at the normal time so that you do not have to drive 40 minutes to go to work, bringing your children with you and then turn around an hour and half later and drive your kids 40 minutes back to school, then drive 40 minutes back to work effectively wasting your entire morning and having to cancel 2 meetings and leave a co worker in the lurch.

Yea, I did. Thanks.

And now you know tomorrow will be a snow day so my kids will be coming to work with me for the day AGAIN. I am so lucky I can do that, seriously, so very lucky. My kids will behave and all but you know.. That’s really the kind of thing that I do not want to abuse.

Side note: One of the traveling guys just walked in here and asked where I was yesterday. Apparently he stopped by to see me while I was making that trip back to the school. It just gets better and better.

If there is no school Wednesday there will be no Zumba!

2. Holyoke. I love you Holyoke. I found a new apartment in Holyoke that’s big and nice and in a good area and the landlord is already a friend of ours. There are kids there that go to school with my kids too. Those of you have I talked to the last few years know of the housing hell we have gone though, from living in downtown to living in a foreclosure. It’s been one big disappointment after another. Keep your fingers crossed for me! It is so hard to find a decent apartment in Holyoke. People either want absurd rents (1250 a month for a one bedroom in the highlands? Really?) or they are back downtown. I am so glad we don’t have to look outside Holyoke.

Bonus! It looks like our trip to Florida to see my grandparents is still on, yay!

p.s I am still putting off buying that phone, I want to see if I wait long enough I will get over my phone lust or it will get cheaper!

P.P.S. Why do I have to play a dollar to go to my kids CYO games? I already paid enough in freaking registration fees and I buy the cruddy food. What does my dollar go to? I had to pay it at all the schools.. I don’t mind so much at Guadalupe.. but Holy Name really doesn’t need my Holyoke bucks as much as say.. Holyoke does.

For an Eternity

2008-12-29T11:02:00.005-05:00

I have been obsessing over this new phone…The Samsung Eternity. It has a 3.2 mega pixel camera. I really don’t know what that means exactly but I know it’s GOOD. I played with it in the store, the pics are incredible. Yes this is what’s important to me in a phone. That it works, takes pics, and has a reminder feature and stores numbers with pictures.

Anyway if I add a line its 9.99 a month for 550 minutes shared (way more then enough, I don’t use the hone much) and my kids can have my pink phone. For when they are away from me, they can’t take it to school or anything.

The cost of the phone is about 200 in store then I get a 50 dollar rebate in the mail. I checked three AT&T stores and this is the best deal I have found so far.

I don’t need this phone, my pink phone works fine, and it just takes crappy pics and has no key board so texting is a pain. The Eternity has a QWERTY keyboard. It’s a touch screen; you can use the touch screen with gloves on. I don’t have to sign up for a huge ass data package (Like with the iphone.) And yes I know it’s an iphone copy.. I just don’t care. I want it.

I am going to buy it on Friday.

Consumerism is alive and well. -Sigh- But I did my research.. I want this phone! It has 3g! I don’t know what that is but I want it. Look!

Also called the SGH-A867, the black-and-chrome Eternity has a 3.2-inch display with haptics vibrating feedback, Samsung's TouchWiz interface, and an accelerometer. Inside you'll find support for AT&T Mobile TV, GPS, a 3-megapixel camera, messaging and e-mail, Bluetooth, a microSD card slot, AT&T's Video Share, a full HTML browser, 3G connectivity, a speakerphone, and organizer options. The Eternity is $149.99 with a two-year contract.

Does the SD slot mean I can take pics and then use the SD card to print them out?

key specifications
• Camera Resolution : 3.0 Megapixel
• Video recording : Video recording
• Music Player : MP3 Player
• Mobile TV : AT&T Mobile TV

QWERTY keyboard
The Eternity™ has a unique onscreen QWERTY keyboard you can access in landscape or portrait mode (or even switch between the two). In either mode, the Eternity™ lets you type as fast as you talk.
3.0 mega pixel camera
With a full 3.0 megapixels, the SAMSUNG Eternity™ will shoot beautiful pictures every time. There’s also a digital zoom, brightness control and camcorder that shoots videos of up to one hour long.

Video review!

The good: The Samsung Eternity has an attractive design with a intuitive touch-screen interface. It offers a solid assortment of multimedia features and good call quality. It also has impressive battery life.
The bad: The Samsung Eternity's virtual keyboard isn't available when entering message recipients. It lacks a camera flash, Wi-Fi and voice dialing and the 3G connectivity could be stronger.
The bottom line: The Samsung Eternity succeeds as a multimedia device, but without Wi-Fi and full e-mail support, it stops well short of being a business-friendly device.
Specifications: Band / mode: WCDMA (UMTS) / GSM 850/900/1800/1900 ; Talk time: Up to 300 min ; Combined with: With digital camera

Pictures taken with the Eternity..
I tried to post them but they are huge.

http://www.infosyncworld.net/resources/products/samsung/samsung_eternity_s00.jpg

http://www.infosyncworld.net/resources/products/samsung/samsung_eternity_s01.jpg

http://www.infosyncworld.net/resources/products/samsung/samsung_eternity_s02.jpg

http://www.infosyncworld.net/resources/products/samsung/samsung_eternity_s04.jpg

And a message board

See, Alex? At least I am a smart consumer.. ist.

Christmas on Masslive

2008-12-24T09:38:00.002-05:00

“Omg! I saw someone today buy king crab legs with food stamps and I am angry because I pay 25 grand in taxes a year and have to eat tuna out of a can.”

Several people chime in about how everyone on welfare is scum and should be shot, even the little welfare babies’ cause they don’t deserve to live. (So far it hasn’t turned into a race thing, but the day is early!) I read all of this quietly and sigh. By the way.. 68 bucks in crab legs? I’m not even sure you’re telling the truth. In fact I just called the S&S on Northampton st and Alaskan King Crab legs are 16.99 a pound so they got 4 pounds of mostly shell.. That’s not exactly a feast, you know?

This one made me snicker…

13712.6. whats wrong with the picture

is that you must make more than anyone in holyoke and you are eating tuna. how many kids do you pay child support on, 9?

Then someone makes the obligatory post (it was not me this time) about how it’s not a big deal and immediately they are called names and assumed to be on welfare.

You have to be poor to have compassion for your fellow man?

Now you know the original poster who is so upset about the food stamp purchase is a devout Catholic or Christian.. So let me just remind them that Jesus was a welfare baby who was born in a dirty freaking barn because his unemployed parents were poor run aways. They would have qualified for food stamps and when the three wise men showed up.. I bet they would have bought them crab legs if they could have.

I know I get on this a lot but I have been on welfare, I have used food stamps. I have seen you give me a dirty look as I swiped that god awful blue card. When I was making nine bucks an hour and the holidays rolled around.. everyone got food gifts from us.. Because I could use my food stamps to buy chocolates or exotic ingredients.

What I think is being forgotten by those so upset is that today is Christmas Eve. Let them eat cake! Or crab. Because I want to be happy today I am going to assume that the shopper has kids and maybe Christmas crab is a tradition, maybe this is a tough year and they already scaled back gifts, cable, activities and the guy just doesn’t want to see the look on his kids faces when they serve spam instead of crab. Who the hell knows.. and who the hell cares?

There are jerks out there abusing the system, I know. But do we have to collectively punish them all for the screw ups of a few? And before anyone goes there.. let me remind you that in Massachusetts we have the Family Cap law, you cannot be on welfare and have a baby and get more money. You get NOTHING for any baby you have after you sign up for assistance. Your family is capped.

Merry Christmas to all the scrooges out there and to all my fellow Holyoke’s who try to make every day the best it can be in our sad little city.

I am buying some crab tonight I think. With cash.

Being Poor

2008-12-18T13:28:00.003-05:00

I came across this today and it really struck me. I have lived more then half of these things, my children have too. I think most people have at least experienced something on this list. Especially in Holyoke. Have you?

Being poor is knowing exactly how much everything costs.

Being poor is getting angry at your kids for asking for all the crap they see on TV.

Being poor is having to keep buying $800 cars because they’re what you can afford, and then having the cars break down on you, because there’s not an $800 car in America that’s worth a damn.

Being poor is hoping the toothache goes away.

Being poor is knowing your kid goes to friends’ houses but never has friends over to yours.

Being poor is going to the restroom before you get in the school lunch line so your friends will be ahead of you and won’t hear you say “I get free lunch” when you get to the cashier.

Being poor is living next to the freeway.

Being poor is coming back to the car with your children in the back seat, clutching that box of Raisin Bran you just bought and trying to think of a way to make the kids understand that the box has to last.

Being poor is wondering if your well-off sibling is lying when he says he doesn’t mind when you ask for help.

Being poor is off-brand toys.

Being poor is a heater in only one room of the house.

Being poor is knowing you can’t leave $5 on the coffee table when your friends are around.

Being poor is hoping your kids don’t have a growth spurt.

Being poor is stealing meat from the store, frying it up before your mom gets home and then telling her she doesn’t have make dinner tonight because you’re not hungry anyway.

Being poor is Goodwill underwear.

Being poor is not enough space for everyone who lives with you.

Being poor is feeling the glued soles tear off your supermarket shoes when you run around the playground.

Being poor is your kid’s school being the one with the 15-year-old textbooks and no air conditioning.

Being poor is thinking $8 an hour is a really good deal.

Being poor is relying on people who don’t give a damn about you.

Being poor is an overnight shift under florescent lights.

Being poor is finding the letter your mom wrote to your dad, begging him for the child support.

Being poor is a bathtub you have to empty into the toilet.

Being poor is stopping the car to take a lamp from a stranger’s trash.

Being poor is making lunch for your kid when a cockroach skitters over the bread, and you looking over to see if your kid saw.

Being poor is believing a GED actually makes a goddamned difference.

Being poor is people angry at you just for walking around in the mall.

Being poor is not taking the job because you can’t find someone you trust to watch your kids.

Being poor is the police busting into the apartment right next to yours.

Being poor is not talking to that girl because she’ll probably just laugh at your clothes.

Being poor is hoping you’ll be invited for dinner.

Being poor is a sidewalk with lots of brown glass on it.

Being poor is people thinking they know something about you by the way you talk.

Being poor is needing that 35-cent raise.

Being poor is your kid’s teacher assuming you don’t have any books in your home.

Being poor is six dollars short on the utility bill and no way to close the gap.

Being poor is crying when you drop the mac and cheese on the floor.

Being poor is knowing you work as hard as anyone, anywhere.

Being poor is people surprised to discover you’re not actually stupid.

Being poor is people surprised to discover you’re not actually lazy.

Being poor is a six-hour wait in an emergency room with a sick child asleep on your lap.

Being poor is never buying anything someone else hasn’t bought first.

Being poor is picking the 10 cent ramen instead of the 12 cent ramen because that’s two extra packages for every dollar.

Being poor is having to live with choices you didn’t know you made when you were 14 years old.

Being poor is getting tired of people wanting you to be grateful.

Being poor is knowing you’re being judged.

Being poor is a box of crayons and a $1 coloring book from a community center Santa.

Being poor is checking the coin return slot of every soda machine you go by.

Being poor is deciding that it’s all right to base a relationship on shelter.

Being poor is knowing you really shouldn’t spend that buck on a Lotto ticket.

Being poor is hoping the register lady will spot you the dime.

Being poor is feeling helpless when your child makes the same mistakes you did, and won’t listen to you beg them against doing so.

Being poor is a cough that doesn’t go away.

Being poor is making sure you don’t spill on the couch, just in case you have to give it back before the lease is up.

Being poor is a $200 paycheck advance from a company that takes $250 when the paycheck comes in.

Being poor is four years of night classes for an Associates of Art degree.

Being poor is a lumpy futon bed.

Being poor is knowing where the shelter is.

Being poor is people who have never been poor wondering why you choose to be so.

Being poor is knowing how hard it is to stop being poor.

Being poor is seeing how few options you have.

Being poor is running in place.

Being poor is people wondering why you didn’t leave.

I'd love to call you sometime

2008-12-16T15:22:00.003-05:00

Why do men ask for a womans number and then not call? Seriously. I admit it, it's bothering me. And what you said.. Was that a line? Because it freaking worked, I can't stop wondering what in the hell you were talking about. I swear to god I was 13 the last time I saw you. So what kind of first are you even talking about? If you had called, I would have asked. I hope this isn't like when I was 13 and it took you like 2 months to call and say Happy Birthday.
Meh.

Buh Bye Bratz!

2008-12-04T09:23:00.003-05:00

I am bound to piss off someone’s mother today but can I tell you how pleased I am that MGA has been told to stop making Bratz dolls?

No more Bratz Dolls will be sold after 2008!

Personally I don’t give a damn about Mattell, Barbie, Carter Bryant (who sounds like a sleaze) or MGA. What I do care about is your daughter growing up to be a hootchie and dating my sons. And yea I really do think these dolls encourage very hootchie like girls.
I even have examples!

That is a dress. It is a whole outfit. That doll is completely dressed about to go out and be a really well behaved good girl with good grades and a bright future. As a hooker. The purple lipstick really completes the look.

Baby Bratz… BABY Bratz. The toddler has make up on and it dressed like a 22 year old about to get her drink on. If she were 22 that would be just fine, but she’s 2. And wearing combat boots and a mini skirt. Because 2 year olds want to be sexy too. Love the eyeliner.
-cry- The shoes. If those shoes were in my size they would have six inch heels. They are the length of the dolls hands.. my hand is six inches from palm to middle fingertip. My feet (Yes I just measured) Are only 8 inches long! These dolls are marketed to your 7 year old. Why can’t she still be wearing keds and patent leather? Doll 1 form the left is not so bad to be honest. Sadly she has obviously been hit in the face with a baseball bat at her last frat party sp that her lips are permantly swollen but she is decently dressed. Doll 2 is apparently trying to make her gynecologist’s job easier, who needs a paper gown when you’re already flashing your cooter at the world? It just goes on from there.. too much make up, too little clothing, too extreme styles for children dolls. It is not the clothes and make up itself though. They are styles and colors I might wear and therein lays the problem. I am a grown woman, little girls do not want to dress like me (Unless they are incredibly precocious little dears!) but they do want to be like their dolls.

Suddenly Barbie seems like nun. I played with Barbie, My little Pony and something called Star Faries.

I had a blue plastic castle.

When I was 8 my father drove down here form New York and bought me this, then go drunk, yelled at my mom and drove away. A few weeks later my star Fairy castle disappeared. I was smart enough to not ask about it.
Disclaimer.. I am aware that responsible parenting can make toys such as Hootchie Mama Dolls acceptable but how many irresponsible parents have you come across in your time? Exactly.
Sidenote.. can you still even buy Keds tennis? Remember Jelly shoes? I grew Up in Jarvis Heights, back them there was a brook running though it and Scott’s tower only smelled like pee a few times a year. Chamura pool was a quarter to get into but they let us poor kids in for free anyway. I think childhood in Holyoke is another days post.
What was your favorite toy growing up?

Better late then never!

2008-12-03T09:35:00.001-05:00

Things I am grateful for.

Oranges in December.
Kids that scrape the ice off my windshield without being asked.
Cake, in a jar!
My avocado plant is 12 inches high.
I have the luxury of throwing out leftovers sometimes
A decent job in this economy
The man at Nicks Nest who said I was a good mom.
Next years desk calendars came early.
Everyone coming to help at the BookFair
Holyoke’s Bloggers
The nice rep at Comcast who didn’t hang up when I told him the rate hike was fucking lame.
Spellcheck.
Netflix.
Glitter in a glass tube
Chunky heels on boots
Brown paper wrap and jute twine
My ninja like bow making skillz.
LOLCATS. (Shut up, there funny)
Red cell phones
Camping at the beach, I am so ready already.
Space heaters
Lentil soup and goldfish crackers
Coffee
My 5 and a half readers!
And one of the biggest things I am grateful for.. College. I want to be a writer, a photographer, a teacher, a nutritionist, a horticulturist, a chef and raise goats. How lucky am I that I live in such a place and such a time that I can want all those things and someone will actually say that I can do it all. There are people in places so unlike what we have that it would shock most of us pampered spoiled brats. Even those one welfare are affluent as compared to most farmer laborers in Africa.

I realize I left out health, family, love and all that cheesy crap but I figure enough people said that boring crap to cover me so I wanted to list the little things, the things that make every day a little brighter. Like having a good pen. You know what I mean? Driving down Riverdale and hitting all green lights. Getting something nice in the mail. Hand lotion that smells like the holidays. Bread. Post it notes! Chocolate donuts (Which I can’t eat, I just like to look at them and sigh wistfully) Rollover minutes. Lazy Sundays. Pizza with spinach and kalmata olives. The Asian art display at George Walter Vincent Smith. Physics. And Alex actually knowing what a Charter School is.

Oh and let’s not forget.. I am grateful that 20 bucks this morning filled my tank. I would have high fived the attendant but bullet proof glass hurts my hands.

Tag, your it, what are you grateful for?

Buy Nothing?

2008-11-28T10:28:00.002-05:00

Buy Nothing day, formally known as Black Friday. I will buy nothing today, not so much as an internet cookie. I will not be shoved, sworn at, stressed out or freaked out today. Though I admit it is easy to do when you have to work all day.

I never did Black Friday, even before I realized what a wasteful event it is. My kids get very little for Christmas. They get enough, more then enough really, but not a whole lot. I do not delude myself that they are perfectly happy about this. Sure they would love a never ending shopping spree, so wouldn't I. But I have tried hard for 12 years to instill in my children a love of all things intangible.

Christmas at our house is a holiday to be together and to love. It is not an excuse to go broke and buy junk. It seems silly to me to hear so many people crying about how hard it will be this year to provide a 'good' Christmas with the financial melt down. (Which really did not affect me and my credit and debt free lifestyle. Why will it be hard? Does the latest techno gadget really make Christmas 'happen' for you?

My recipe for a 'good' Christmas..

Snow
Twinkling white lights
Hot chocolate
Slippers
Corny music that only sounds pretty Christmas Day
Family

Stir well.

What makes your Christmas good?

Atlantis

2008-11-19T11:33:00.002-05:00

Thanks Rachel for this…

Atlantis is a landscape created by Gayle Chong Kwan out of semi-opaque plastic food packaging that the artist collected from London dwellers. The project was inspired by the lost city of Atlantis and it is no coincidence that many of these food containers are often to be found at the bottom of many bodies of water, forming a new sort of city created from waste. Climate change, urban planning and communal living are all themes evoked by this fascinating depiction of the Atlantis we are creating.

Artist: Gayle Chong Kwan
+ arts-co.com

I love those pics, the eerie lighting is perfect. It reminds me that plastic itself is pretty eerie.. It’s never going away and we better figure out what to do with it all.

And Mike.. the guilt! Thanks for pointing out my plastic coffee lid last night. When I got home I dug out all those great travel mugs I have and should be using.. and will be for Tuesday nights “I need to be awake enough to drive home after this meeting’ coffee.

It’s been crazy here in the midst of our Plastic Revolution and we have been slacking off like 17 year old but it’s less then an ounce pot head. The kids have end of term exams all this week which at least means no homework, scout meetings, basketball and an awards ceremony for Soccer tonight. This weekend we are goingt to see a play, go to a scout event and then a Falcons game. Sunday is officially homework day for me, it has to be.

Who needs sleep anyway?

Random Tuesday

2008-11-11T09:05:00.003-05:00

My boss wears way too much cologne.

Mattresses are entirely overpriced.

I hate having to go to the post office when it’s cold out.

It’s freaking cold out.

I think I look kind of great today.

I think loosing all this weight has inflated my ego.

I have to write a poem about a kiwi.

All my bills are paid and on time this month.

We made pumpkin bread this weekend and it’s already all gone.

I wish Tuesday Scouts was at 6 and not 7.

I wish Alexander was on this coast and not that coast.

I need to get keys made today.

Does the White House use CFLs?

Do you?

Friday Funny

2008-10-31T14:13:00.001-04:00

Butt!

2008-10-28T08:58:00.000-04:00

Part of my day job deals with traffic tickets. Yesterday an interesting one passed my desk.. Littering. A 1500 dollar ticket for flicking a cigarette butt onto the ground at a truck stop. The guy who got the ticket is livid and spent a good 10 minutes shouting at me because I expect him to pay it and pay it promptly. If not, he will be out of a job.

When he calmed down he apologized, he really is normally a good guy. He asked what I thought about the ticket and I had to be honest.. I think it’s great. I think it’s about damn time we started enforcing litter laws. Cigarette buts are trash, they are poison, they smell bad and why should I or you, our children, our pets and our wildlife have to deal with someone elses dirty stinking habit?

It is estimated that several trillion cigarette butts are littered worldwide every year. That's billions of cigarettes flicked, one at a time, on our sidewalks, beaches, nature trails, gardens, and other public places every single day. In fact, cigarettes are the most littered item in America and the world. Cigarette filters are made of cellulose acetate tow, NOT COTTON, and they can take decades to degrade. Not only does cigarette litter ruin even the most picturesque setting, but the toxic residue in cigarette filters is damaging to the environment, and littered butts cause numerous fires every year, some of them fatal.

This has been an on going problem in Holyoke and everywhere. Next time you see someone flick a butt.. walk over and say.. “Oh look, you dropped something” And point it out. Just.. you know.. try not to get shot.

White Privilege

2008-10-24T09:39:00.001-04:00

I am white. My friend Sean says I am so white I am like the bleached white flour used in making wonder bread before it’s even mixed with all the water and chemicals. I think that means I am super dorky white. Sean is a big black man from Texas who wants to buy my children Pimp cups (I’m not really sure what those even are). Little does he know I plan to stealthily teach his baby daughter all about Greenpeace and peta! Ha! Win!

Ok maybe not Peta.. I’m not that crazy.

Anyway that conversation got me to thinking about this article I once read..

This is your nation on White Privilege

Go read it, it’s quite interesting.. I will give you a few snippets here.. Warning.. this is politically charged and NOT all are my personal views, I just find it interesting.

White privilege is when you can develop a pain-killer addiction, having obtained your drug of choice illegally like Cindy McCain, go on to beat that addiction, and everyone praises you for being so strong, while being a black guy who smoked pot a few times in college and never became an addict means people will wonder if perhaps you still get high, and even ask whether or not you may have sold drugs at some point.

White privilege is being able to say that you hate "gooks" and "will always hate them," and yet, you aren't a racist because, ya know, you were a POW, so you're entitled to your hatred, while being black and noting that black anger about racism is understandable, given the history of your country, makes you a dangerous bigot.

White privilege is being able to dump your first wife after she's disfigured in a car crash so you can take up with a multi-millionaire beauty queen (who you then go on to call the c-word in public) and still be thought of as a man of strong family values, while if you're black and married for nearly 20 years to the same woman, your family is viewed as un-American and your gestures of affection for each other are called "terrorist fist bumps."

White privilege is being able to be a gun enthusiast and not make people immediately scared of you.

White privilege is being able to have a husband who was a member of an extremist political party that wants your state to secede from the Union, and whose motto is “Alaska first,” and no one questions your patriotism or that of your family, while if you're black and your spouse merely fails to come to a 9/11 memorial so she can be home with her kids on the first day of school, people immediately think she’s being disrespectful.

Just something to think about this weekend.

Are you sure?

2008-10-23T09:06:00.002-04:00

This flier was handed out on Suffrage Day, April 24, 1915.
Notice that there are only 11 reasons listed. Also, the last line of text reads,
"Give this to a friend and ask him to vote for it."

Massachusetts 2008 Ballot Questions
Ballot Question 1: A Proposed Law to Eliminate the State Income Tax

Question one.. I am 90 percent sure I am voting No. It comes down to simple math and common sense. Income tax accounts for 45 percent, on average, of our state budget and that money has to come from somewhere. Losing the State Income tax will not get rid of blight or welfare or pork barrel programs. If we don’t pay it on what we earn we will pay it at the store, at city hall, excise tax, property tax, higher registry fees. I find it much more reasonable to pay tax on what I earn.. If I make 500 a week and you make 1000 a week it makes no sense for us to both pay say.. 300 bucks to renew our drivers licenses. It makes more sense for us to both pay a percentage of what we earn.

Ballot Question 2: An Act Establishing a Sensible State Marijuana Policy

Last year I was approached to sign the petition to get this question on the ballot.. and I refused to sign. I come from a family of heavy duty drug addicts and I was once a heavy pot smoker myself. Those of you who know my oldest son and how smart he is .. would you ever guess I spent the early months of that pregnancy high as a kite? I’m still thanking god for his health every day. The day I found out I was pregnant I never did another drug. What I am saying is that I know first hand what drugs are and what they do.. Pot is not harmless.. it’s NOT like a beer or cigarettes. My instinct is to vote no.. no no no.
On the other hand I would vote to make pot entirely legal and taxable. If it were legal and taxable it would become like alcohol and could be more controlled and dealt with by the public. We can teach responsible use like we do for drinking. Right now all we can teach is ‘No, Pot is bad! Stay Away!” Which is right.. but if we make a little bit ok.. it just seems to me like it makes us hypocrites.
“Drugs are bad!.. but you can have a tiny bit.”
Seriously? Who can say that to their kids?
“Stabbing people in the face is bad! … but you can stab them just a little.”
Ok so I am exaggerating but you get my point, no?
I can’t make up my mind.

Ballot Question 3: An Initiative for an Act to Protect Greyhounds
I didn’t even know about this question. Excuse me while I go look it up.

This proposed law would prohibit any dog racing or racing meeting in Massachusetts where any form of betting or wagering on the speed or ability of dogs occurs. The State Racing Commission would be prohibited from accepting or approving any application or request for racing dates for dog racing. Any person violating the proposed law could be required to pay a civil penalty of not less than $20,000 to the Commission. The penalty would be used for the Commission’s administrative purposes, subject to appropriation by the state Legislature. All existing parts of the chapter of the state’s General Laws concerning dog and horse racing meetings would be interpreted as if they did not refer to dogs.
My grandfather adores greyhound racing and as long as dogs are not being abused I’m not really sure why this is a problem. People race and enjoy it.. Why is it bad for dogs? And why are we so much more concerned, as a society, for animals then we are for people? What about homeless starving children in our own towns? What about abused babies?
Greyhounds? Really? Let ‘em race. I’m more concerned with the decline of the climate and toxins in our food to be too worried over a dog race.

Economical Romance!

2008-10-21T21:25:00.003-04:00

If I ever hit my head really hard and get married again do you think anyone would object to this being our wedding song?

Lyrics

Parody of T.I.'s smash hit "Whatever You Like" By Wierd Al

Hey girl,
You know our economy's in the toilet
But I’m still going to treat you right

I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

Tater tots, Cold Duck on ice
And we can clip coupons all night
And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

Take you out for dinner, anywhere that you please
Like Burger King or Mickey Ds
And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can even have the large fries (large fries) yeah, yeah

Baby, you should know I am really quite a sweet guy
When I buy you bathroom tissue I always get the two-ply
Want it, you can get it, my dear
I got my Costco membership card right here, yeah

You like Top Ramen, need Top Ramen
Got a cupboard full of 'em, I’ll keep 'em coming
You want it, I got it, go get it, just heat it
Dump the flavor packet on it and eat it

Pork and beans and Minute Rice
And we can play Cribbage all night
And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

I can take you to the laundromat downtown
And watch all the clothes go round and round
And baby we can go wherever you like (if you like)
I said we can go wherever you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

Hottest shorty I know, if you had some lipo
You could be second-runner-up Miss Ohio
Seven dollar bills rolled
Up inside my plastic billfold
Buy you a bagel even if it isn’t day old
And you never ever gotta wear your sister’s old clothes
As long as I’m still assistant manager at Kinko’s
Cut your hair with scissors and a soup bowl
You ain’t got to pay me, that’s the way that I roll

My chick can have want she want
At Wal-mart she can pick out anything she want
I know girl you ain’t never had a man like that
Who doesn’t make you buy generic brand like that, Yeah

You like my Hyundai, see my Hyundai
I can take you to see your cousin Phil next Sunday
But that’s kind of far and I’m not made of cash
Do you think you could chip in for gas?
Mac and Cheese would be all right
But let’s send out for pizza tonight
And you can order any toppings you like (if you like)
I said you can even have the last slice (the last slice) yeah, yeah

Ran myself a cable from my neighbor next do'
Now I can get free HBO
And baby you can watch whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can watch whatever you like (if you like) yeah

And you can always ride the city bus
Got a stack of tokens just for us
Yo, my wallet’s fat and full of ones
It’s all about the Washingtons, that’s right

You want White Castle, need White Castle
Long as you got me it won’t be no hassle
You want it, we’ll get it, just don’t be a hater
If I grab a bunch of napkins for later

Thrift store jeans on sale half-price
The underwear at Goodwill is nice
And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

Baby, I can give you anything you please
Even share my government cheese
And baby you can have as much as you like (if you like)
I said you can have as much as you like (if you like) yeah, yeah

Dear Connecticut Ren Faire

2008-10-21T10:43:00.002-04:00

Dear Connecticut Ren Faire,

This was the second year I took my kids to the CTRF, We actually came twice but I wanted to tell you about Sunday the 19th, closing day from the point of view of my family.

We got there around 1 and thankfully missed the long lines for tickets.It was cold and windy but we were undeterred (Well I was deterred but kids are never cold.) We bought our tickets and missed the college student discount you offered last year but it is still well worth the money. This year I not only brought my children but I brought the 6 year old daughter of a friend who had no idea what this was. She does not speak in front of people she doesn’t know and in public will mostly whisper. She is painfully shy. Unlike my own children who are loud and adorably obnoxious. No, really.

Pirates at the gate had her eyes so wide I thought they might pop out of her pretty little head. We took our Mandrake Mystery paper and realized we should have brought a pencil, but I applauded that you did not give out those little wasteful golf pencils that end up on the ground and in the trash or sticking out of a previously happy little eyeball. That is not an idea for a Zoltan trick either.

Trick or Treating and a mystery to solve! You could not have put together two better things in our humble opinions. The three of them Belly danced for clues and hopped on one foot and had to cross their eyes and tell scary stories, it was really great fun for me to watch.

Most amazing of all was that one booth demanded a song.. from my sweet little princess who had barely uttered 'Trick or treat' for the last hour. (Yes she really is a Princess, I bought her pretty hair bows to make it official) There she stood, like a deer in the headlights

"Do you know I'm a Little Teapot, Little Mistress?"

She looked sideways at me as if to say Excuse me but there is a weirdo man speaking to me and you need to make him stop … I began to interject that she does not speak..

"Yes.." She said, clearly. I shut my mouth and the boys stopped being hyper (Thank the Play Free Devil Sticks guy for the Pixie Stix, really)

There she was .. Miss I am too shy to speak in front of anyone I have not known since birth.. Singing, loudly! And people clapped! I swear, Erin, I did NOT tear up. Much. The kids got their clue, solved the mystery and got knighted. How cool is that? They got KNIGHTED. I cannot tell you how awesome that is to kids.

We watched the Duelists, my boys adore that show (They don't get most of the jokes though thank goodness) and Rosalitas puppets. We ate a pickle and a bread bowl and watched the most dramatic wedding ever! When my little Princess for the day saw that .. How can I express into words the joy on her face? This time I teared up, for real. She clapped without me prompting her and yelled and cheered when the evil Morganna was beaten. She watched Zoltan from start to finish, even when I covered my eyes and turned away. I was worried it might too much for this delicate little flower.. how naive am I? She LOVED it. She picked out some fairy stones and danced to the pirate music.. a little anyway. She was enthralled with the .. Tree Spirit? And still has not figured out how that can be a person in there so tall. I've decided not to explain stilts to her. Why ruin the magic?

My kids, who have a seen it all before kind of pre teen 'tude let themselves be kids for the day. They Trick or Treated and raced around for clues, they battled a man with foam swords but spent so much time laughing at themselves they both got thier butts whipped. Thank you for helping me remind them that being a little dorky is not so bad.

I may sound dramatic myself over all this but this little girl recently lost her mother, two sisters and may soon be losing her grandmother. She doesn't have a whole lot to smile about these days. Shes only 6 years old. Thank you for helping me expand her world a little and see her smile agian.

Next year, I think, we might actually dress up. We want too.. we just haven't gotten up the nerve yet! I guess I have taken up a lot of space here to say, simply.. Well Done.

Always,
ReduceHM

P.S. What are the chances of getting some recyling bins for next year? Or maybe a whole recycling ‘green’ committee? It will help save money and the planet!

The Mall Killed holyoke

2008-10-20T09:05:00.002-04:00

Everyone is talking lately about bringing big business to Holyoke. I get the thought behind this, tax revenue, lower crime, safer streets, more jobs but I like to think I am looking at a bigger more long term picture.

A Wal Mart in Holyoke will cause pollution, trash, litter, poverty, traffic, strain our hospital and any number of other small trickle down effects. BMaverick is snorting so hard right now he just inhaled his moustache.

I do understand what Wal Mart would bring as well.. more jobs, competitive grocery prices, convenience. I just happen to think it’s worth it, to me, to drive to Big y, BJ’s, Price Rite and even Trader Joes if it means I feel better about my purchases.

Every dollar you, as a person, as a voter, as an American spend.. is a vote. Every single dollar is a vote. Think about that. If you buy flip flops made in china by pre teens who can only pee once a day and eat nothing but rice while working with toxic chemicals that cause burns and rashes.. you are essentially saying to that 12 year old girl that you don’t give a flying fuck abut how she was ripped from her family, half starved, abused and hit.. you just want cheap flip flops you didn’t have to drive more then 4 miles for. And maybe that’s ok for you. I can really understand that. Not everyone has an overdeveloped sense of empathy. Not everyone should.

But it matters to me. If I want cheap flip flops, I will by them second hand, because then my buck, or by then only 25 cents, goes to support something I believe in like the Salvation Army or some Joe the Plumbers tag sale or Big brothers and Big Sisters.

I do not really know if it is possible but wouldn’t it be nice to see downtown go the way NoHo has? Small independant shops, people WANTING to come there. I like spending an afternoon lazily poking around Main St in Northampton. We grab lunch at Bueno Y Sano or Sushi at Soo-ra, Ice Cream at Harrell’s and pick up some groceries at Cornucopia I can’t get at S&S or Big Y.

I take my kids to downtown Holyoke now and then.. I do not want them growing up in fear of their own city. We use our heads.. lock up the car, don’t leave things in plain site etc. I try to shop there.. but it’s just cruddy that nothing is really.. there. We use Chips to fix our car, even though he has no weekend hours and once got hair cuts down there but never will again because no one spoke English and they really butchered my oldest sons’ hair. He wore a hat every day for a month.

Lowes alone will not “Save Holyoke” So tell me.. what will?

Mmhmm

2008-10-14T14:45:00.003-04:00

Craptacular

2008-10-13T09:58:00.001-04:00

The ren faire was great! We will be going back next Saturday as well. On Sunday we drove over to Chicopee and watched the Toy Run leave form the Wal Fart parking lot. How amazing was that! There had to be abut 500 bikers all with toys driving over to Brightside to distribute the gifts to the residents there. For those of you who do not know.. Brightside is something of a modern day orphanage for troubled youth. We even saw a few people we know. Hey Michael!

After that and an extra long trip to Radio Shack so I could hem and haw about getting a cell phone that like.. works and stuff. (And takes pics.. I want a flicker photo stream so bad!) They kind of laughed at my old cruddy phone. It’s worked forever though and it’s CHEAP! It’s just a little tracfone. We have been thinking about dumping the landline though and just using a cell phone. Here is the math..

I pay about 40 bucks a month for Comcast phone service. And then another 30 bucks a month, on average, for my tracfone. I make almost all of my daily calls from work and rarely use my land line. So why not dump the land line and pay 60 bucks a month for an AT&T cell phone and then I can also email pics to my family without having to lug around my camera and then upload the pics later. I think the average cost will even out so I might not actually save but.. along with dumping the landline.. we might dump cable TV too. It’s crap and we rarely watch it. I will miss some channels though.. Food network, TLC, Discovery, Science channel and the Green Channel.. Oh and BBC. Maybe we could just go back to super basic.. That would include some of those channels still I think.

Anyway so after Radio Shack (I have to THINK for a week before I actually buy the phone and all) we went down to McCray’s Farm. All I have to say is…

PUMPKIN ICE CREAM.

Go get some, bring me some too! It was heaven in a hot and crispy waffle cone. There is no better fall moment then that. The little guy got orange pineapple but was not duly impressed. We strolled about the animals, which stank to high heaven and then took a hayride to pick pumpkins. Someone left their trash on the wagon and it nearly ruined my mood. Is that silly? I can’t help it. How hard is it really to throw your shit out? They have cans EVERYWHERE you lazy jerk. Trash on the pumpkin patch is just.. craptacular.

We got great Pumpkins though! Mien was two toned, green and yellow but both super bright. I think it’s actually a gourd. What do you do with a gourd anyway? Can I eat it?

We finished off the day at home making wheat bread form scratch. The price of bread is killing me these days. But this took 4 hours. There has to be a better way. Anyone have any tips on quick cheap whole wheat bread?

After the Bailout

2008-10-10T08:34:00.002-04:00

After The Bailout
by Andrei Codrescu
All Things Considered, October 9, 2008 ·

I was sharpening my chain saw when they called me from Washington, D.C., to ask me how to fix the economy.

This request focused my thoughts, or the lack of 'em, to such a fine point, I gave my 14-inch Echo an edge it never had. Good enough for cutting half a cord at least, to keep the wood stove going through October. I love not paying the oil company a nickel. Except for the half-gallon of gas and the chain oil, but I'm fixin' to make the thing run on plum brandy. I've got a plum tree.

Ah, where were we? The economy, yes: $700 billion is more than enough money to buy every able-bodied American a chain saw, a solar-powered generator and a stake in a communal well and windmill. Also, red dirt and plum trees. That would probably only cost about $100 billion, and you can use the other $600 billion to buy everybody their house outright.

Now everybody can own their house and be green and self-sufficient, and can go back to whatever they were doing before the world ended: watching TV. Except for me. I was sharpening my chain saw.

So I go back to it, and I see a line of refugees coming up the road to move in with me. Oh my God, it's the '70s again. All my deadbeat friends — dead and alive — are being chased out of their homes and heaven for not owing any money. They are debt-free in a world that can't exist without interest rates. The dead are especially egregious in this regard; you can't squeeze even an extra penny out of them.

Oh, no, now that they are getting closer, I don't even think it's people from the '70s: It's people ... from the future!

It's worse than I thought: These are people independent from foreign oil, carrying solar-powered chain saws, full of American ingenuity. After the bailout, they owned their own homes, they didn't pay into a corporate energy grid, and they didn't worry about food because they grew it on the roof. They didn't drive, because they didn't have any jobs to drive to, and every garage in America was the site of an invention that was so darn beneficial nobody needed anything from the store.

Without worries about money, without a job, and with extra space in the garage to grow food and invent, these people forgot about the stock market, stopped borrowing money, even forgot how to shop — in short they stopped being American. These un-Americans got their exercise raking the compost instead of circling the mall; they home-schooled their children and were never again embarrassed that their kids knew more than they did. Heck, they were in heaven, the place where the pursuit of happiness leads to when you stop pursuing it.

Such self-sufficiency made the economy grind to a halt, so the government had to do something again: They called in the Army to chase everyone out of their self-contained greenhouses.

And now they are coming up the road to my place because I'm a poet, and I live in a compound defended by polygamist haikus.

"What did you do wrong?" I asked the first of the refugees to get over the palisades.

"Nothing," he said. "We just got out of debt and stopped watching TV! So the urge to buy things on credit disappeared. So they sent in the troops. First thing they did was to put a 40-inch plasma TV in every room and fixed it just so we couldn't turn it off. Just like in Orwell, only with much sharper images. They are calling this the Second Bailout, or the Bail Back In."

"At least the Second Amendment is safe," I said. "Nobody took away your guns, and the Founding Fathers didn't say anything about TV."

And with that, my chief haiku welcomed them thus:

make yourselves at home

you won't be bailed in or out again

you're safe in Second Life

Thee, Thou and wow!

2008-10-09T12:44:00.003-04:00

This weekend we are heading down to the RENAISSANCE FAIRE. Which is in all caps because I cannot spell and so I copy/pasted that from the page. We went last year for the first time and I will admit that last year I had doubts…

Everyone is going to be a world class nerd.

I will look really out of place.

I will want to laugh rudely at everyone.

Yea.. I’m not really that nice when no one is looking. Within seconds of walking though the gate though I realized that I was wrong. And more.. I was jealous! I want to be cool enough to wear a freaking fairy costume and feel perfectly okay abut it. Seriously! Maybe even some Dragon Pajamas!

Apparently he sells ice cream and that’s really his costume.. It’s no joke.

Check out Tony Mateus blog and visit to the Faire last weekend here. His pics are fantastic.
I avoided the giant Cholesterol fest masquerading as a Turkey leg (but good god that smelled good, for a carcass and all) and watched all the shows.. Including ZOLTAN THE ADEQUATE
Fire eating, insane magic, crowds going wild. It is just a few things you can expect at this magic comedy show you won’t forget. Tat guy rocks! I nearly peed my pants laughing. And those Duelist guys are pretty hot.

I got turned onto it by my dear friend Erin who helps run the faire while working and jogging and obsessing about pasta and spending too much energy making silly people happy. If I can get her to wear some fairy wings I will be sure and post pics!

Well, now you know.

2008-10-06T08:35:00.005-04:00

Here are some simple tips to help you in working toward a life without plastic, or a life of safer, more informed plastic use. I borrowed this list and held onto it so long I cannot recall where I pilfered it from, sorry!

Avoid polycarbonate (#7) baby bottles and sippy cups. For baby bottles, try and use glass (e.g., Evenflo), polyethylene (e.g., Evenflo, Medela, Playtex) or polypropylene (e.g., Gerber, Medela) instead. Sippy cups made of stainless steel (e.g., Kleen Kanteen), or of polypropylene or polyethylene (e.g., Avent, Evenflo, First Years, Gerber, Playtex) are safer. Be sure to check the bottle or cup to be sure of the type of plastic it contains. As for baby bottle nipples, try and use silicone which does not leach the carcinogenic nitrosamines that can be found in latex.

If you must use polycarbonate (#7) bottles, avoid heating food and drink in the bottle. Heat it in a separate container and transfer it to the bottle once it is warm enough for the child to eat or drink. If the plastic is showing signs of wear – scratched, cloudy – discard the container.

For drinking water, try and avoid plastic bottles. If you do use plastic bottles made from #1 or #2 plastic try not to reuse them as they are intended only for single use. One alternative is a stainless steel water bottle. For storing large quantities of water, glass and stainless steel containers are also available. If you use a #1 water bottle, try to consume the contents as soon as possible because leaching of antimony increases with time.

Try to avoid heating foods in plastic containers, especially in the microwave oven, which can cause the plastic to degrade and leach chemicals faster. As well, leaching increases when plastic comes into contact with oily or fatty foods, or when the plastic is scratched, worn, cracked, or sticky.

Use plastic wraps with caution, especially in the microwave, and try to keep the plastic from touching the food. Alternatives include wax paper or paper towels.
Try and use alternatives to plastic packaging and storage containers. Cloth, paper or cardboard are possibilities for transporting groceries. Stainless steel and glass food storage containers are available.

Avoid plastic dishes and utensils for meals. Alternatives include glass, ceramic, wood, stainless steel, and lacquer ware. Offer your child or grandchild a non-plastic dish set made of either stainless steel or wood (safely coated using the Japanese lacquer technique).

By the way, I have no idea what the safer japanese laquer technique is or if I even spelled that right but I DO know what Bento Boxes are and 'Laptop Lunches' both are very cool and most are earth friendly though not excatly wallet friendly and since frugalness supercedes eco awareness in my world.. my kids just eat school lunch and I sigh deeply wishing I had the time or money (or energy, lets face it) to pack them up a delicious healthy lunch that they wouldnt be afriad of getting picked on for.

Coming soon.. The Farm, The Painting and the Transfer Station.

Bail who out?

2008-09-25T09:13:00.001-04:00

I'd like someone to come and buy my bad debt and bail me out. I made some bad choices.. Why isn't anyone cleaning up my mess? I also bought a vacuum that works like crap; the government should come and fix that too. -tic-

In all seriousness.. I think this big bailout is a bad idea.. coming at the end of a long line of really shitty ideas. Like war, destruction, taxes, sub prime lending! (I was I the only broke single parent who choose NOT to take one of those loans? Where my bailout for that GOOD choice??) George bush is determined to make sure he goes down as the worst president ever, anything good he ever did will be forever erased by this last big bang.

Maybe letting the American economy suffer is not such a bad thing. So a few people won't be able to buy Wii's this Christmas, boohoo. Maybe seeing a few victory gardens won’t be so bad. Canning food? Not that hard, I have been doing it for ten years. Stretch a meal, add beans, there cheap and healthy. Buy second hand clothes, it's easier then you think and no one will actually know. Learn to budget! I have a fantastic link on how to budget that’s so easy a toddler could do it.

Why would it be so bad for Americans to get a little financial smack upside the head? We consume too much and we waste too much. We should have to tighten our belts. This government bailout is a cop out and does a disservice to the taxpayers. Why should *I* have to pay for a bunch of rich guys to stay out of debt/ Are those same guys going to forgive my debts/ or yours? -Insert canned laughter-

By the way.. my kids are getting a Wii because they and I saved for one. Shocking concept.

The good, the bad and the cancer causing causing crap.

2008-09-16T09:10:00.003-04:00

Now that you know what each of the numbers represents, here are the kinds you should look for at the store:

Safer Plastics

#2HDPE, #4LDPE and #5PP

These three types of plastic are the healthiest. They transmit no known chemicals into your food and they're generally recyclable; #2 is very commonly accepted by municipal recycling programs, but you may have a more difficult time finding someone to recycle your #4 and #5 containers. Milk, water, and juice bottles, yogurt and margarine tubs, cereal box liners, and grocery, trash, and retail bags. Not known to leach any chemicals that are suspected of causing cancer or disrupting hormones. # 4 LDPE Some bread and frozen food bags and squeezable bottles. Not known to leach any chemicals that are suspected of causing cancer or disrupting hormones, but not as widely recycled as #1 or #2. #5 PP Some ketchup bottles and yogurt and margarine tubs. Hazardous during production, but not known to leach any chemicals that are suspected of causing cancer or disrupting hormones. Not as widely recycled as #1 and #2.

#1 PET

#1 bottles and containers are fine for single use [what is fine about single use???] and are widely accepted by municipal recyclers. You won't find many reusable containers made from #1, but they do exist. It's also best to avoid reusing #1 plastic bottles; water and soda bottles in particular are hard to clean, and because plastic is porous, these bottles absorb flavors and bacteria that you can't get rid of. Also used to make soft drink, water, sports drink, ketchup, and salad dressing bottles, and peanut butter, pickle, jelly and jam jars. Not known to leach any chemicals that are suspected of causing cancer or disrupting hormones.

PLA

PLA (polylactide) plastics are made from renewable resources such as corn, potatoes and sugar cane and anything else with a high starch content. The starch is converted into polylactide acid (PLA). Although you can't recycle these plant-based plastics, you can compost them in a municipal composter or in your backyard compost heap. Most decompose in about twelve days unlike conventional plastic, which can take up to 1000 years.

Plastics to Avoid

#3 PVC

Polyvinyl chloride (PVC) is often used frequently in cling wraps for meat. However, PVC contains softeners called phthalates that interfere with hormonal development, and its manufacture and incineration release dioxin, a potent carcinogen and hormone disruptor. Vinyl chloride, the primary building block of PVC, is a known human carcinogen that also poses a threat to workers during manufacture.Most cling-wrapped meats, cheeses, and other foods sold in delicatessens and groceries are wrapped in PVC. To soften into its flexible form, manufacturers add “plasticizers” during production. Traces of these chemicals can leach out of PVC when in contact with foods. According to the National Institutes of Health, di-2-ethylhexyl phthalate (DEHP), commonly found in PVC, is a suspected human carcinogen.

#6 PS

This is baaaad stuff. Extruded polystyrene (#6 PS; commonly known as Styrofoam) is used in take-out containers and cups, and non-extruded PS is used in clear disposable takeout containers, disposable plastic cutlery and cups. Both forms of PS can leach styrene into food; styrene is considered a possible human carcinogen by the International Agency for Research on Cancer. It may also disrupt hormones or affect reproduction. Foam insulation and also for hard applications (e.g. cups, some toys) Benzene (material used in production) is a known human carcinogen. Butadiene and styrene (the basic building block of the plastic) are suspected carcinogens. Energy intensive and poor recycling.

#7 PC

#7 Polycarbonate (PC) is found in baby bottles, 5-gallon water bottles, water-cooler bottles and the epoxy linings of tin food cans. PC is composed of a hormone-disrupting chemical called bisphenol A, which has been linked to a wide variety of problems such as cancer and obesity.Baby bottles, microwave ovenware, eating utensils, plastic coating for metal cans. Made with biphenyl-A, a chemical invented in the 1930s in search for synthetic estrogens. A hormone disruptor. Simulates the action of estrogen when tested in human breast cancer studies. Can leach into food as product ages.

But don't worry, the government will keep you safe.. right?

Little Giggles

2008-09-13T22:32:00.001-04:00

I said to bigkid tonight.. "I should laugh more, shouldn't I? I am too tense and worried all the time."

And bigkid said.. "I'm not like that!"

And I said.. "One day you will be all grown up and be that way too."

And bigkid said.." No, Mom.. Laughter will always be my second language."

What a wonderful thing to think. Laughter should be everyones' second language.

Plastics, De-coded

2008-09-12T09:53:00.005-04:00

If you click on the above photo the picture will open larger for easier viewing.
There are many types of plastic in common use. Plastic must be sorted by type for recycling since each type melts at a different temperature and displays different properties. The plastics industry has developed identification codes to label different types of plastic. The identification system divides plastic into seven distinct types and uses a number code generally found on the bottom of containers. The following table explains the seven code system.

Plastic #1: Polyethylene Terephthalate (PETE)
Common uses: 2 liter soda bottles, cooking oil bottles, peanut butter jars. This is the most widely recycled plastic and often has redemption value under the "Bottle Bill."

Plastic #2: High Density Polyethylene (HDPE)
Common uses: detergent bottles, milk jugs.

Plastic #3: Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC)
Common uses: plastic pipes, outdoor furniture, shrink wrap, water bottles, salad dressing and liquid detergent containers. Please note that plastic bags are not accepted for recycling curbside. However, stop and shop and Big Y Supermarkets accept plastic bags for recycling. Please remove food waste and receipts.

Plastic #4: Low Density Polyethylene (LDPE)
Common uses: dry cleaning bags, produce bags, trash can liners, food storage containers. Safeway Stores and Lucky Food Centers accept HDPE (#2) and LDPE (#4) plastic bags for recycling.

Plastic #5: Polypropylene (PP)
Common uses: bottle caps, drinking straws. Recycling centers almost never take #5 plastic.

Plastic #6: Polystyrene (PS)
Common uses: packaging pellets or "Styrofoam peanuts," cups, plastic tableware, meat trays, to-go "clam shell" containers. Many shipping/packaging stores will accept polystyrene peanuts and other packaging materials for reuse. Cups, meat trays, and other containers that have come in contact with food are more difficult to recycle.

Plastic #7: Other
Common uses: certain kinds of food containers and Tupperware. This plastic category, as its name of "other" implies, is any plastic other than the named #1-#6 plastic types. These containers can be any of the several different types of plastic polymers. Recycling centers cannot recycle plastic #7. Look for alternatives.

In-ter-est-ing

2008-09-07T08:32:00.001-04:00

This is not real.

2008-09-05T09:03:00.005-04:00

I had to share this post made by Crunchy Chicken over at .. http://crunchychicken.blogspot.com/ Go check her out.

Why I love Sarah Palin
As the Republican National Convention wraps up I thought I'd take a moment to publish this list. I think it's very enlightening.

Top 5 Reasons Why I Chose Sarah Palin as my VP

by John S. McCain

1. She knows how to cook a mean wolf steak with polar bear sauce

2. She's young and hot and well, who knows whether or not Cindy will be in a disfiguring accident - it's good to have a backup

3. When I go hunting with her, I don't have to worry about getting accidentally shot in the face

4. She's good at eliminating, I mean, firing people, so I don't have to get my hands dirty if someone doesn't, well, work out

5. Cindy, Sarah and I would make a great threesome

Googled Holyoke Pics and got these...

2008-09-05T08:30:00.003-04:00

Any idea where this was excatly?

For all intents and purposes, the Holyoke Mall at Ingleside is–at least for the moment–the largest mall in New England. It will soon be eclipsed by the Natick Mall, which is nearly doubling in size, and technically, the Northshore Mall in Peabody, Massachusetts is the largest shopping center in sheer square footage. However, Northshore’s floorspace is tucked into its five massive anchor stores, two of which are currently dark, while Holyoke Mall is a true giant.
View from Mt Tom. So pretty!

Holyoke High School Football Field. Has it ever looked so nice agian?

Holyoke Childrens Muesum. Giant germ fest.

Just a lazy sunday picnic in the hood.

Disguntled

2008-09-04T08:53:00.002-04:00

I have a friend who saves her pee, dilutes it and uses it to fertilize her garden. I have another friend who washes all her laundry by hand to save water. Another who makes all her own shampoos, soaps and skin products. Several who can their own winter fruits and veggies. And a handful who are making a huge effort to buy NO plastic what so ever.

Me? I do the little things. I pick up other peoples trash, I buy the product with less packaging when given the choice. I buy mostly organic. I use less harsh detergents and soaps. I turn down the heat and I try very hard not to buy plastic crap.

So when someone who doesn't even know me that well makes a joke about my eco-awareness.. it's funny, even to me, the first time. The second time I chuckle, the third time you get a dead pan stare and the fourth time I am going to start making fun of your faults and believe me.. I will out funny you.

No one likes having their beliefs trounced. And these are not my beliefs. It isn't like being an atheist or a catholic. It is not black and white. The world is hurting, the planet is suffering, these are facts. Look out your window and you will see it yourself. I am saving the world today, one square inch at a time.

What the hell are you doing?

All photos were pilfered from this fantastic article, it really is worth a quick read.

Buh Bye Summer

2008-09-03T10:00:00.002-04:00

Rudds! is it already closed for the season? I feel like Rudds has single handedly cut off Summer. Like a pissed off girlfriend. Is it really closed? has Rudds given us all summer blue balls??

Or is Rudds just playing hard to get?

When does the Holyoke Public Library start Fall hours? I hate the summer hours. They close at like 6 pm. I like to take my kids there during the school year once or twice a week and do our homework together. I find we all get more done when we are away form the distractions of home.

What else happens in Holyoke to tell us that summer is over and winter is about to come and laugh at us as we shovel out our driveways?

By the way.. does anyone else find the shape of Holyoke to be.. rude?

The BPA Primer

2008-08-30T10:48:00.006-04:00

I borrowed the following from The Green Mommy. It is an excellant explanation of BPA which is a main componant of most plastics. Plus I have nothing interesting to say today except that Holyoke did a great job on the Fireworks!

What is Bisphenol-A (BPA)?
BPA is a chemical compound invented in the
late 19th century by a Russian chemist. Manufacturers use this industrial
chemical to primarily to produce polycarbonate plastics like plastic water and
baby bottles, plastic children’s toys, pacifiers, CDs and DVDs, medical
equipment and much more. It is also used to manufacture epoxy resins like those
found in food cans, circuit boards, dental sealants and some paint.

In short, if it’s plastic it probably contains BPA. The US, on average,
manufactures almost 800 million kilograms of the stuff each year. It is
everywhere.

What’s wrong with Bisphenol-A (BPA)?
Oral toxicity of BPA is
relatively low. For example, your average lab rat would have to eat 3.25 grams
of the stuff to kick the bucket. But I doubt any of my readers would consider
pouring themselves a bowl of BPA and chowing down.

The real concern regarding BPA lies in consistent, long-term exposure
to the chemical. You see, BPA is a known endocrine-disruptor. The chemicals that
comprise BPA–when compounded as they are–mimic estrogen in the body. Our medical
and scientific community has known about BPA’s estrogenic effects since the
early 1930s. That’s almost eighty years.

What are the health risks and diseases associated with exposure to BPA?
The risks are many, and great. As more research continues on the subject of
BPA exposure and health issues, the chemical is linked to a greater number of
diseases. This represents a short list.
Diabetes and Insulin Resistance
Lupus
Breast Cancer
Prostrate
Cancer
Reproductive System Cancers
Ovarian Cysts
Decrease in Male Fertility

But isn’t our exposure to Bisphenol-A (BPA) minimal?
“Minimal” is a
subjective term.
The American
Chemistry Council, PlasticsEurope and Japan Chemical Industry Association over at Bisphenol-a.org would have you
believe that your exposure to BPA is minimal indeed and utterly safe, but do you
really trust the industry–those who profit on the continued production of this
chemical–to give you a straight and honest answer on its safety?
Sadly, a 6-year
study on BPA exposure indicates that 95% of the adult population is so
exposed to BPA that we actually excrete the chemical in our urine. A different study conducted in 2003 and 2004 concluded that 93%
of tested children excrete the chemical through their urine. The chemical is
also present in the amniotic fluid of pregnant mothers as well as the cord blood of the infant at birth.

When it comes down to it, do you want to to expose your body or your
children’s bodies to any level of a known endocrine disruptor or human
carcinogen?

What’s the government doing about bisphenol-A (BPA)?
While the US
government seems to have little interest in protecting its population from the
negative effects of BPA, other governments are taking the lead in fighting
against BPA’s manufacture and use. On April 18th of this year, Canada became the first nation to ban the use of BPA in baby
bottles thus helping to protect the nation’s youngest citizens from greater
exposure to the chemical. Canada’s ban is slated to become law in October 2008.
The City of San Francisco, always a forerunner on issues such as this one,
banned the sale of products for young children that contain BPA (like baby
bottles) in 2006.

If you are concerned about BPA exposure and would like to see your
government follow Canada’s lead, contact your legislative representatives. (US
citizens can do so here.)
How are we exposed to Bisphenol-a (BPA)?

While BPA is everywhere, food and drinking containers seem to pose the
single greatest risk for BPA exposure for adults and children, while the fetuses are exposed to the chemical through their mothers.
Breast-fed infants are exposed to limited amounts of BPA through their mothers’
milk while infants who are formula fed are exposed to approximately 11 times
that amount through infant formula and plastic baby bottles.

Examples of Products Containing Bisphenol-A (BPA):
While this list
is hardly complete, it should offer you a good idea about the types of products
you should avoid if you intend to limit your exposure to BPA.

Cans of Food: Cans of food are often manufactured with a lining that
contains BPA. The purpose of this lining is to protect the food contained
therein from the metal of the can. It also helps to prevent canned food from
developing that off-taste that marks it as, well, canned food.
Plastic Water
Bottles: Water bottles made of polycarbonate plastic often contain BPA. The risk
of BPA leaching from the bottle into your water increases with subjecting your
bottle to extreme temperatures like sending it through the dishwasher or placing
it in the freezer.
Infant Formula: Cans of infant formula are a notorious source
of BPA exposure. The lining in the cans of both powdered and liquid formula
contains BPA. When the formula is fed to an infant, that infant is ingesting
BPA. Indeed, 1
in 16 babies fed formula are exposed to harmful levels of BPA.

Plastic Baby Bottles: Like polycarbonate water bottles for adults,
plastic baby bottles also pose a risk for BPA exposure. The risk might even be
considered greater since these bottles and the formula in them are often heated
which increases the rate at which BPA leaches.
Plastic Food Containers:
Plastic food containers often contain BPA and, like baby bottles, the rate at
which BPA leaches from the container and into your food increases with extreme
temperatures. So microwaving your container is a bad choice as is freezing it.
Other Sources: Without a doubt, food containers comprise our biggest source
of exposure to BPA, but that does not mean it is our only source of BPA
exposure. Indeed, BPA is an ingredient in many other manufactured products such
as CDs and DVDs, baby pacifiers, children’s toys, sports equipment etc.

Limiting Your Exposure to Bisphenol-A (BPA)
While you cannot avoid
exposure to BPA entirely, you can limit your exposure to the chemical by using
appropriate forethought, caution and by purchasing products that are BPA-free.
Glass Jars: As an alternative to canned foods, you can purchase foods in
glass jars or jar food yourself with mason jars. While the
lids on these glass jars may still contain an epoxy with BPA, that is a
considerable amount less than a can that is completely lined with the same epoxy
resin.
Non-plastic Water Bottles: Ditch your polycarbonate plastic bottle
and opt for a water bottle that does not contain plastic. Sigg water bottles offer an
excellent alternative to polycarbonate plastic water bottles and are attractive.
They also have a lovely line of kids bottles that could replace a BPA-containing sippy cup.

Breastfeed: Breastfeed your baby and continue to breastfeed your child
until they are ready to wean. By breastfeeding you not only limit your baby’s
exposure to the BPA in the lining of formula cans, but you also limit your
baby’s exposure to the BPA in plastic baby bottles. If you encounter
difficulties breastfeeding look into support from organizations like La Leche League and consider milk sharing or donor
milk programs that will get the good stuff into your baby’s belly.

Use BPA-free Baby Bottles: If feeding your baby at the breast is not
always possible, and you must use a bottle either occasionally or frequently,
try using glass baby bottles or BPA-free baby bottles. We used glass
baby bottles from Even-flo for my son. BornFree bottles are BPA-free and present an excellent
alternative to polycarbonate plastic baby bottles.
Non-plastic Food Storage
Containers: My heart will always rest with mason jars since they’re relatively inexpensive and fairly
accessible. I use them for food storage, not just canning.
Other Sources:
When it comes to children’s toys, switch from numerous cheap plastic toys to a
few hand-selected wooden or cloth toys. There’s a handful of
BPA-free pacifiers like those made by Gerber which
are made of latex and those made by Binky which are silicone.

EcoBags

2008-08-29T09:09:00.001-04:00

I ran over to Stop and Shop last night to pick up a few things for supper and to use a couple of coupons. I had a rain check for pencils. Anyway, it was one of those rare times when everyone I interacted with at the store was perfectly nice and helpful. The cashier especially was an absolute doll. I had several complicated coupons, my rain check, two free items and my own bags. What's more is that she remembered me and my bags! I use organic cotton string bags and when someone compliments them I immediately whip out a card for this site.

http://reusablebags.com/

I had given her a card before and she actually checked out the site! yay! The more people that buy these bags, the better. Did you know that for every reusable shopping bag you use at Stop and Shop they take a nickel off your grocery total? It's not much, I know but last night I saved a quarter. If I saved a quarter a week that would be about a dollar a month and 13 bucks a year. For thirteen bucks I can take my kids out for ice cream. Buy an inner tube for their bike; buy myself a small lobster, new make up, a pair of clearance shoes at payless, five cups of coffee at DD or three gallons of gas. Oh, and I earned another 10 cents off a gallon gas which will come in handy if gas jumps again due to Hurricane Gustavo.

The boy who set fire to the parsons Mill in June was found guilty. Being that he is only 13 though we will never know what happens now. Does he go home? Lock up? Foster Care? I hope it's not lock up; kids just come out worse from those places. I say that only because I know it to be true. I worked with those kids. Maybe this case will be different. Who knows?

Fireworks tonight! I'm so glad Holyoke is still having them. The kids and I are going to watch them with the Republican Social Worker and his kids. What are you doing for the fireworks?

Sauce, I makes it.

2008-08-28T09:45:00.001-04:00

Less then a week until School starts. Is anyone NOT excited? Well, besides kids. We met the kids new teachers this week already and I already know of them, she is fantastic and just pushy enough to keep my little guy on his toes.

Gas is still at 3.56 at my local Stop and Shop, plus 10 cents off every time i spend 50 bucks in the store. How sad is it that i think that's cheap!

Big Y has local tomatoes on sale this week for a dollar a pound, yay! I'm thinking about picking up about 20 pounds and making some yummy pasta sauce for the winter. Opening a canned jar of summer 'mater sauce in january is like crack for your taste buds. Seriously.

Apparently I have nothing really interesting to say today, but I have not yet checked out Masslive. :o)

Polluters

2008-08-27T10:42:00.002-04:00

Pollute

Rustle Rustle..
In the grass.
The soft wind
Blows across the soccer field.

Hurry Hurry
Cry the kids.
The warm air
Stinks of some stupid guys cigarette smoke.

Puff Puff
The man huffs.
The hot ash
Falls to the ground to meet the dirty squished butts of his brothers.

I'm taking a poetry class this semester. I wonder if bad poetry still gets an A for effort.

We are only in week 2 of soccer season and already people are trashing it up. leaving Gatorade bottles littering the field, flicking butts all over the parking lot. Little bags of chips fly around in mini sidewalk hurricanes. Then they go home and scream at their kids for leaving a wet towel on the floor. Seriously?

My car is always messy but I don't mind. It's messy because I pick up the trash they leave behind. But not with a Nifty Nabber -ahem-. Nothing drops from my hand to the ground. I take it home and toss it in my recycle bin. It is probably the simplest thing I do all day.

A Drop at a Time

2008-08-26T10:49:00.000-04:00

I'm back! It's been so long since I last posted I am sure I haven't any readers left, in fact I think I can hear a cyber echo in here. Holyoke is much the same, though wetter these days. We had some crazy rain for a weeks and most of my tomato plants keeled over. My peppers are starting to grow though!

Pom, my once favorite juice, has gone over to the dark side and now uses plastic bottles. Their website has a bunch of reasons why, such as it creates less pollution to make plastic bottles as opposed to glass (Can that really be true?!) But ignores the fact that glass can be reused, repurposed and easily recycled. If you leave glass in a landfill it will never turn toxic, it won't kill birds and fish and eventually it will break down. Plastic is forever, like diamonds but less sparkly. I have no favorite juice now AND I am running out of drinking glasses.

My Eco-Kids are doing well and soccer season is on it's way. I am dating a republican social worker... that's actually not a joke either. Ha! We have gotten our weekly trash down to about 2 bags full! The recycle bin is chock full every two weeks. Keep in mind though I hope to eventually only have one bag of garbage and nothing in the recycle bin. Sadly cutting out plastic is extreamly hard for us. Sometimes it's a time issue, as in I don't have time to search for wooden toothbrushes. Sometimes it's a price issue, I can't afford 50 dollar mascara in a metal only tube. And sometimes it's just.. not gonna happen, as in I tried to make my own shampoo but it made my hair feel like microwaved dry 'sgetti. Not pretty.

So I have come to feel that for me it's going to all about doing what I can. I brush my teeth a few times a week with baking soda, but not every day. I use my deodorent rock when it's cooler, but not for the beach. I buy organic foods when I can afford them, but not when the rent is due. I bought a cozy wool sweater to help me keep the heat down this winter. I invested in super warm camping socks for the boys for the same reason. I stopped buying commercial dish soap and sponges and switched to Dr. Bronners and dishrags.

If anyone is still out there.. What small changes have you done?

Cheap date

2008-03-20T13:26:00.002-04:00

Frugal lovin'. Not that I'm doing it, but I might be thinking about it. -grin-

Snagged from an e-mail.

Take a walk on the beach at twilight; picnic optional.

Visit your local public gardens in the spring when everything is blooming.

Hike a beautiful trail and have a picnic.

Walk through the center of your town during the holiday season and enjoy the store displays and lights.

Pick an outdoor activity such as in-line skating, cycling, or jogging, and go with your honey.

Take a scenic drive through a wooded area or country road and talk.

Check with your local museum for days when admission is free. Even if you pay, it's still a relative bargain for an all day date.

Enjoy free live music, share a cup of coffee, and browse new titles at your local bookstore.

Go to the mall, not to shop but to people watch! Sit on a bench together and chat about the people you see. Try to figure out who they are and what they are shopping for.

Cook dinner for one another. Include candles and a fancy tablecloth (or a blanket on the rug if you don't have furniture).

Walk to a local fair (parking costs money) and view all the items on display. Enjoy free entertainment.

Go apple picking and make a pie together.

Go pumpkin picking and make a jack-o-lantern and pie together.

Go strawberry picking. Melt chocolate, dip strawberries, and feed to each other.

Hold a potluck with several other couples. Watch the game, play Twister, or share stories of your most embarrassing dating moments (with your former dates, of course!).

Volunteer for a cause you both believe in. Work at their events and attend for free - they get help and you get a free night out.

Stay in one night and feed each other in bed.

Do a sexy dance for each other.

Leave the kids with grandparents. Tell them you're going out to dinner, then enjoy your empty abode together, as if it were a hotel on your wedding night.

Light a fire and read poetry to each other. If you don't have any, get a book from the library or write your own love poems.

Go to a bar and have soda pop. Often, bartenders will give it to you on the house - tip them well.

Grab a trash bag or a plastic tray and sleigh ride down a snowy hill. When you get to the bottom (or fall off your "sled"), roll around with each other in the snow.

Or have a snowball fight. Then come in and enjoy hot cocoa and warm kisses.

Buy a membership or a season pass to an activity you both like (your local Y, nearby theme park, community theater, state parks pass). Use it as often as you like during season for some quality together time you will both enjoy. Once it's paid for, the rest of your dates are "free."

Go Christmas caroling together. If you're good, you might even collect tips!

Ebay is a Temptress.

2008-03-19T08:28:00.002-04:00

Isn't it pretty? I'm wearing it now, and I look fantastic. It is only half past 8 and six people (not including my kids) have already told me I look great today. It's going to be a good day.

Now this purchase was neither frugal (at 25 bucks) nor green (Shipped form Hong Kong) but it was a reward for reaching a personal goal in my life. Isn't it pretty?! If I were less camera shy I'd snap a pic of me in it but.. well, I won't delude myself that you care that much.

Another friend of mine, Erin, who is too snobby to share her blog with us all, shared with me a book she’s on her way to go pick up called Skinny Bitch. It's a book I have been meaning to read for months but it's not at my library yet so today I must break down and purchase it. I know the most environmentally friendly thing is to find a small bookshop to buy it from (only since I cannot get it from the library) but the small bookshops are 40 minutes away from home and 90 minutes away from work. So that leaves either Amazon, EBay (I do so love me some Ebay!) or Barnes and Nobles. I am not a retail giant fan. But would I rather see all the carbon emissions form shipping the single book to my door? Being green is not as always easy as I wish it were.

I haven't given a shout out to FreeCycle lately so if you have not ever checked it out, you must! Free Cycle is a play on the words Free and Recycle (Like you didn't know) It is an online community where people can post things they want to get rid of. Got a new Energy star fridge? great! Don't toss that old thing in the landfill though! I can guarantee there is someone in need who will come to your house and haul it away for thier own use. Saving you the work and expense of ridding yourself of it and providing them a fridge for free! I have gotten rid of furniture, computers, clothes and even food. We have received on freecycle clothes, books, furniture, games, tickets.. Anything you can imagine. There is one local to you, I promise, go take a peek!

I'm going to go some actual work now in my fantastic new blouse.

Insta' Food

2008-03-18T09:49:00.001-04:00

Tia left a comment yesterday about how she cuts down on her grocery budget and it got me thinking about a lot of things I bet we all do or could do that would make a big difference. So I gathered some recipes for ‘make your own’ instant foods.

One simple ones are frozen pizza’s. We make little English muffin pizzas and freeze them, uncooked. Then you can pop them in the oven when ever you want. Instant pizza!

Homemade instant oatmeal
Ingredientsquick-cooking oatsnonfat dry milk powder (vegans and the lactose-intolerant can skip this)

salt

one Splenda packet (or 2-3 teaspoons of sugar)
Optional- cinnamon, dried apple bits, Dried fruit, brown Sugar

Measure, mix, and store
Into a container or bag, put:

1/2 cup oats1 tablespoon milk powder

1 splenda packet

1/8 teaspoon salt (or more, to taste)

Extras.

Seal the container and shake it up. You now have one serving of instant oatmeal to take to work, school, etc.!

To use your instant oatmeal: put it in a bowl, add about a cup of hot water (give or take), stir, and let it sit for a minute to cook. Enjoy!

Instant Rice mix

Ingredients:

4 cups long cooking rice,

uncooked1 package (1/2 oz. size)

onion soup mix

1/4 cup dried minced onion

1 tablespoon dried parsley

1/4 teaspoon garlic salt

1/4 teaspoon saltDirections:

Combine ingredients; store in an airtight container for up to 4 months. Attach instructions.

Instructions: Mix one cup mix with 2 cups beef broth in a 2 quart pan; add one tablespoon butter. Bring to a rolling boil; reduce heat. Simmer, covered, until liquid is absorbed, about 10-15 minutes.

All Purpose cake mix

Ingredients:

10 cups all-purpose flour

6 1/4 cups sugar

1 cup cornstarch

5 tablespoons baking powder

1 tablespoon salt

2 1/2 cups vegetable shortening

Directions:
In a large sifter, combine flour, sugar, cornstarch, baking powder and salt. Sift, in batches, into a large bowl. Use a pastry blender or a heavy-duty mixer to blend in shortening until mixture resembles cornmeal in texture. Spoon into a 20-cup container with a tight-fitting lid. Seal container. Label with date and contents. Store in a cool, dry place. Use within 10 to 12 weeks. Use this mix as you would a packaged cake mix. ALL-PURPOSE CAKE MIX makes: Lemon Pound Cake, Yellow Cake, White Cake.

Almost Hamburger helper

Ingredients:

2 cups nonfat dry milk

1 cup corn starch

1/4 cup beef bouillon powder

2 tablespoons onion flakes

1 teaspoon dried basil

1 teaspoon dried thyme

1 teaspoon black pepper

2 tablespoons dried parsley

1 tablespoon garlic powder

***Chili Mac:***

1 pound ground beef, browned and drained

1 cup water1/2 cup macaroni noodles (uncooked)

2 cans chopped tomatoes

1 Tb chili powder1/2 cup mix

***Stroganoff:***

1 pound ground beef, browned and drained

2 cups water

1/2 cup mix

2 cups uncooked egg noodles

1/2 cup sour cream

***Potato Beef Casserole***

1 pound ground beef, browned and drained

3/4 cup water6 potatoes, peeled and thinly sliced

1 cup frozen mixed veggies

1/2 cup mix

***Quick Lasagna: ***

1 pound ground beef, browned and drained

1/2 cup mix1 onion, chopped2 cups water

16 ounces tomato sauce

3 cups lasagna noodles, uncooked, broken in bits

1/4 cup parmesan cheese

2 cups mozzarella cheese, shredded

Directions:
Mix the ingredients together and store in an air tight container. Use mix as a base for the following dinners. Chili Mac: Combine all and simmer 20 minutes or until macaroni is cooked Stroganoff: Combine all except sour cream. Simmer 20 minutes or until noodles are tender. Stir in sour cream and serve. Potato Beef Casserole Combine all and simmer, covered, until potatoes are tender, about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Remove cover and cook until excess water is evaporated. Quick Lasagna: Combine all except mozzarella in large skillet. Bring to a boil, let simmer for 15 minutes or until noodles are cooked. Top with mozzarella. Turn off heat and let cheese melt.

Let me know if you try any and how they taste for you. We use the Hamburger Helper one a lot.

Bonus hint! I buy the full fat ground beek for a fraction of the price of lean and simply rinse and drain it, nealry all the fat washes off.

Panic at the Budget meeting!

2008-03-17T09:39:00.002-04:00

So This weekend I got my electric bill for the last month at the new apartment. Keep in mind this is a large first floor old apartment not set up in a way very conductive for air flow. There is little insulation it would appear in the walls and nothing between the basement and the floor. The bill is Gas AND electric so it was for heat (2 baseboard heaters and 2 space heaters) Lights (we are big on turning off lights though with kids the bathroom light stays on all night) Hot water (We have cut back to showers only every other day, not sure if that will fly come summer though, wash dishes once a day) and a gas stove. Also, one or two loads of laundry in COLD water, washed and dried, daily. So guess how much the bill was?

Three.. Hundred.. smackaroos.

I think I fainted. I was in shock, I am NOT kidding you. I cannot afford this on top of a 600 dollar rent! I am calling the landlord today to see if he can reduce the rent, I’m not even kidding you. And this week I am caulking every last little draft I find and pray summer comes quick. We don’t use air conditioning, but we do use a lot of fans. And we have a TON of windows so I think if we only use the fans in the room we are in and at night I can cut that bill in half. And hang clothes outside.

I went freezer shopping this weekend too but after the electric bill came in, I chickened out. I plan to call the electric company and ask them how much they think the freezer will run me a month and if it is worth it.

Seeing as I need to save even more now here are some ideas for cutting food costs that I borrowed from another site .. and I can’t remember where! If you know please please let me know so I can link back to them ASAP.

6 easy ways to keep food costs down

Eat more vegetarian based meals. Typically, meat is pricey, especially when compared to beans and frozen veggies. We are experimenting with making more meals meat-free and are having a blast. Last week, we enjoyed Pasta with Butternut Squash and Ricotta, Pad Thai with Tofu, and Vegetable Curry. Personally, I’m using it as an excuse to explore ethnic cooking. I estimate that we can save over $30 a month by skipping the meat at most meals.
Start a “Soup and Sandwich” night. Planning a “soup and sandwich” night once a week helps me save money. That night is all about simple comfort food, nothing fancy. I like to pair a classic grilled cheese with canned tomato or potato soup. How about a tuna or turkey melt with veggie soup? Substitute a baked potato every so often to mix it up. Just make it cheap and with the stuff you have at home.
Bring your breakfast AND lunch from home. Just do it. Eric keeps oatmeal, trail mix, and breakfast bars in his desk for quick breakfasts and snacks. For lunch he takes the leftovers from the previous night or I pack him a sandwich, salad, yogurt, and snack. You’ll be shocked at how much you can save by brown bagging it 5 days a week.
Minimize waste. Waste is the enemy of economy. At these prices you simply can’t afford to allow the food go bad before you can use it. I always cook fresh meat dishes in the first few days after shopping, with fish and shellfish being cooked within 1 day of purchase. Pad the end of your week with cheaper and less perishable meals like sandwiches, pasta, frozen meals, and soups. If we have meat or veggies at the end of the week it is almost always from my freezer. Eating the fresh food first really helps cut down on spoiled or unused food and that equals savings.
Plan (and hope) for leftovers. When planning your week make sure to make note of possible leftovers. I find that if I don’t plan for leftovers I’ll end up making too many dinners that week and something goes bad (either the fresh food or the leftovers). Serve the leftovers for lunch or have them again for dinner a few days later with an interesting side dish or topping. Push back meals that don’t have perishable ingredients to make room for those leftovers. Utilizing leftovers is key when stretching the budget.
Tap your pantry once a week. I usually have one or two nights a week where I don’t plan a dinner. That “free space” allows me to push back meals to take advantage of leftovers or other cravings and it “forces” me to use what I have. Many of us have stocked pantries but don’t use the food in them. When I moved I found canned corn and jello that was 5 years old! Match up the fresh food that needs to be used with several pantry items to create something interesting. Your pantry and your pocketbook will thank you.

Are you feeling the crunch at the supermarket? How do you plan to save money on weekly meals?

Off the Rolls

2008-03-14T09:45:00.001-04:00

I hope I have been at least moderately missed. In the time I have been away we have moved, lost all the state aid we used to get (Which is both a great thing and a scary thing) rekindled my oldest and most dear friendship and worked my ass off.

The new house is mostly great. It’s old and cold and drafty and needs so much work. Like the bizarre hanging THING in the dining room and the spots in the kitchen where you can see down between the wood floor and SEE the basement. Or how the guy upstairs is using the driveway as a car lot.

On the other hand we have a lovely yard, plenty of room to garden and a fantastic deck. We have so much more room and so many great windows. We have the huge basement (when it is not flooded) and a place for the washer and dryer. I love the living room. And I might talk to the guy upstairs about maybe helping me find a cheaper more fuel efficient car. I have a good car now but as gas hikes up.. I want to go even smaller.. a little rice burner maybe! Heh.

Life has changed recently for us. We no longer get that 400 bucks in food stamps each month (We never could spend it all) but I really don't have an extra 400 bucks to replace that so while I have ALWAYS been frugal with food money I now need to cut that four hundred.. into about 200 a month.. meaning yes.. fifty bucks a week to feed a family of three a healthy, mostly organic diet.

Stop snorting.

I have in recent weeks discovered the CVS GAME (Thanks Frugal Friend!) and tonight I am going to make my first Walgreens trip armed with coupons. I also ordered the Sunday paper to start being delivered, I love having it right there each morning! And I have started cooking ahead more. Big Y is awesome for meats with the buy one get two sales! Tomorrow we are going to the evil giant that is Wal-Mart and buying a chest freezer. I shopped around and it is the only place were I can afford one. I also added a ton of new links to the list, check them out!

Not much else is new. The boys start baseball soon, I aced my midterms, work is.. Well it’s there every day and for that I am grateful.

I hope your all well!

It's a Fishy thing

2008-01-29T10:58:00.000-05:00

So I heard back from Stop & Shop but not from Pom Wonderful, it has been 8 days now. I’ll post the S&S form letter (that’s what it was, nothing personal about it, they even got the town wrong) at the bottom.

Have you heard of freecycle? It’s an excellent little group and there is one in your town I’d be willing to bet. Last week someone offered a fish tank with all the fixings. Last year when we moved all our fish died.

27 dead fish. That’s a smell let me tell you.

It was a sad sad day in the Soapy Fresh house. So I promised the boys that when we moved for the last time that we would once again get fish. We gave that tank away to my ex-husband and his cheating whore that he refuses to marry.

So anyway, this guy offer’s a 10 gallon tank with all the fixin’s.. I went THREE times to find him and three times I got lost. At this point I have wasted more gas then a new tank would probably cost. I mapquested the directions, with maps and all and will try again tomorrow night. Kids better seriously appreciate this thing. Ugh.

Tonight I have to go sell back my last semester books. Does anyone have any idea how college book publishers get away with charging 140 bucks for a book?? It’s got to be like taking candy from a baby. I’m feeling pretty gripe-y today, can ya tell?

Stop and Shops crap letter..

From :

Sent :
Thursday, January 24, 2008 4:45 PM
To :
Granola
Girl
Subject :
Ref # 465428 - Reply from Stop & Shop
Consumer Affairs

Thank you for contacting us with
your request for more varieties of Pom tea. Because of the number of
product inquiries we receive for the many thousands ofavailable products, we
regret that we cannot research each request we receive. We wish we could
carryall available products, but that is not possible. So, we rely on
market research, information provided byour suppliers, and, of course, what our
customers are asking for. We make every effort to carry those productsour
customers want, and constantly review product selection and monitor customer
requests. Decisionsare based on product availability, customer requests,
and the selection of similar products in thesame category. Please know,
however, that we will forward your request to the appropriate buyerfor their
information and consideration. I have also forwarded your request for more
natural foods atyour Northampton (the store is on Northampton St, not IN
Northampton) store to our merchandisers as we know there is a growing interest
in these products. Thanks, again, for contacting us to let us
know how we could better serve you. We appreciate hearing from you.

Sincerely, Monica Johnson
Customer Care Representative
Ref: 465428

Be Prepared

2008-01-28T08:30:00.000-05:00

Many of you might not be that familiar with the Boy Scouts of America and I wasn't either until just last year when Little Guy wanted to become a cub scout. Out of boredom at those meetings my Big Guy wanted to join the Boy Scouts.

And thus our lives were forever changed. No, seriously. Scouting is a huge commitment not just on the boys parts but on the parents as well. In my case.. that means me.

I didn’t mention it last week but Little Guy earned his bobcat badge and during the small simple ceremony I was called up to my surprise and red faced embarrassment. Little Guy had to pin me with a matching small bronze pin. It's on my purse now and I am extremely proud of it!

Big Guy went camping with his troop this weekend and came back Sunday dirty, stinky and tired. Just in time to wash up for an Eagle Scout banquet.. What a huge deal! Two state senators came, the mayor, the pope wrote him a letter as did the speaker of the state house and some other political figures spoke on the boys behalf. I cried a little, I admit. it was all very moving. When he pinned his mother and father, thanking them for all the help and support they had given him I wondered if I have it in me to support my boys all they way to Eagle Scout. I intend too. I know it will be a super pain in my ass now and then but I intend too. Being an Eagle Scout is like sticking your foot in the door to any college or job you want and being able to shove the door open a little wider.

I am already planning how to come up with the money for the boys eagle banquets and I have 7 years to go for Big Guy and 9 for little guy!

I mentioned this to an internet friend of mine, Fonce, yesterday and again to a mother at the party yesterday. It's sticking with me even today and has given me a lot to think about. What I said was this.. I can raise my boys to be fine young men, I can teach them right form wrong and how to be good and kind and smart and recycle. How to treat a woman on a first date, how to use the oven.. But I cannot possibly teach them how to be regular guys. I can't teach them to throw their stinky socks around and watch football on Sunday with their friends while throwing popcorn at each other. I cannot even hope to teach them the secrets of boys, the codes of men. And I don't want too. Since my ex-husband in more interested in fighting with his cheating girlfriend then hanging out with his sons.. I am hoping that scouting will help my little men become annoying, bothersome, pain in the ass men someday.

Preferably after they have moved out.

What's it worth to you?

2008-01-25T08:16:00.000-05:00

A super cool lady at on a message board I waste valuable company time on posted an interesting question. What would you be willing to give up for a cause you deeply believed in? My knee jerk reaction is anything. I raise my kids to be the same. I believe we have no other options then to be prepared to give up everything for the right reasons. Like plastic. Just slowly. In my reply to her, I added the most touching quote I have ever read, I have a little print out of it that I keep in my purse (right next to the Love letter from Frank to Mia)

“In Germany, the Nazis first came for the Communists, and I did not speak up
because I was not a communist. Then they came for the Jews, but I did not speak
up because I was not a Jew. And then they came for the trade unionists, and I
did not speak up because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the
Catholics, but I was a Protestant, so I did not speak up. And then they came for
me, and by that time there was no one left to speak up for anyone. To make sure
this does not happen again, the injustice to anyone anywhere must be the concern
of everyone everywhere.”
Yom HaShoah 2006/5766Rabbi Nina H. Mandel

Think about it. Really think about it. As a society we can no longer afford to shut our collective eyes to the horror and tragedy surrounding us. The things we say “it’s not my problem” to today will be your children’s problem tomorrow.

What would you be personally willing to give up? What is the one cause that inspires you to want to do great things? For me it is the environment and cancer. Cancer is pulling too many of my most loved friends away from me. I want to hear your thoughts!

How to make your own yogurt and save the world.

2008-01-24T09:30:00.000-05:00

Ok , so maybe you're not saving the world, but Beth from over at Fake Plastic Fish (A must read blog, especially for the fantastic photos she has up of her trip to Hawaii to fix her hair dryer.. see, now your curious) brought up a really good point abut making your own yogurt. I do make my own fage (thick Greek yogurt with a wallop of muscle building protein) But I have never tried to make my own regular 10 o’clock snack yogurt to reduce my use of yogurt containers. Because while I have given up my morning Dunkin Donuts coffee and opted for making coffee at work every morning and I have given up all forms of plastic wrap, plastic bottles and any beverage in a plastic bottle, I am not quite ready to let go of my yogurt. The 8 minutes when I shut my office door and slowly eat my yogurt are way too precious to me!

Baby steps, people! :o)

Maybe the best way to reuse my containers is to simple refill them with my own yogurt. It can’t be any harder then making fage, right?

Yogurt Recipes

http://www.fakeplasticfish.com/2007/12/plastic-free-yogurt-well-almost-plus.html

http://www.motherearthnews.com/Whole-Foods-and-Cooking/1980-03-01/Make-Your-Own-Yogurt.aspx

http://www.instructables.com/id/Make-Your-Own-Yogurt_1/

And my favorite recipe for Fage!

http://bean-sprouts.blogspot.com/2007/11/how-to-make-greek-yogurt.html

I’m going to try making some regular yogurt this weekend. Classes start up again for me Friday and the kids have a boy scout trip and I have a lunch date with a very dear old friend. But maybe I will forgo sleep for yogurt, sleep is overrated.

Attack of the containers!

2008-01-23T09:56:00.000-05:00

Every day around 10 in the morning I have some yogurt, lately it’s been Dannons Activia (they have a yummy cottage cheese version too) With live active cultures which helps keep your insides clean. And, seriously, who doesn’t a want shiny clean and fresh intestinal tract? Plus peach is yum. But what to do with all the plastic yogurt cups? I so admire the people I hear about who bring glass containers back to the store etc but there is no place within 100 miles of me that offers anything like that and even if there was I’d be left with the dilemma of burning gas to drive there or using plastic.

So I thought I would do a spot of research on what people do with their plastic yogurt cups. I found a few little ideas here and there and came up with my own, here is a short list.

Pots for starting seeds
Crayon cups
Bath tub cups (for little ones)
Pre-meausred instant oatmeal so the kids can grab and go.

Then I found this!! http://www.terracycle.org/yb/yb.htm How exciting! Schools could actually collect yogurt tubs, butter tubs, cottage cheese etc and get money back for sending them in. It’s a win win. Please check it out and pass it along.

Sadly it seems that my little dannons, having to reusable lid, aren’t good for a whole lot. But I’m still thinking! The Fage (greek yogurt, very thick and slightly sour) make great Tupperware type containers for my work lunches, I fill them half way, the single serves that is, and get a good months use out of one. I just need to find a better way to store them.

I heart POM

2008-01-22T08:42:00.000-05:00

Pom Wonderful is best known for those funky fat hourglass shaped bottles in the produce section of Stop and Shops and Big Y. While I always admired the bottle (Which seriously was kind of sexy looking) I cannot stand straight up Pomegranate juice, blech. So imagine my joy when just last week I popped across there newest product.. Pom Tea! My Stop and Shops only carry three flavors.. Pomegranate Lychee green tea, Pomegranate Peach Passion White Tea and Pomegranate Blackberry. According to the Pom website

http://www.pomwonderful.com/lightpomtea.html

They have several other deeelish flavors. I will be sending them (and Stop and Shop) a quick note to let them know I would be simply orgasmic if they could expand their selection in my local area. I would bet Whole Food or possibly Trader Joes carries them but those are both 40 minutes away and thus I only shop up there once a month.. mostly for the Hummus and Fage and soy chips. Trader Joes rocks. Anyway.. Where was I?

Oh right, the letter!

Dear Stop and shop,

I shop at my local Stop
and Shop between two and five times a week and spend an average of 500 dollars a
month in your stores. That figure is on the rise now that I have discovered the
wonderful Pom Teas in the produce section. I am writing to ask if you might soon
be carrying more flavors of the tea? According to the Pom website they have
light Tea as well with half the calories and different flavors.

Also, is there any chance you will be expanding your natural foods
section and selections any time soon? I primarily shop at the **edited** street
location.

Thank you,
**edited**

And to Pom.

Dear Pom,

I am writing to compliment you on the Pom Tea's I recently
discovered in my local Stop and Shop. I love the size of the drink and the fact
that it is nearly plastic free. Is there any chance you will be getting rid of
the plastic film on the product any time soon? My family and I are trying to
greatly reduce our plastic waste this year.

I also noticed on your
website that you have several more flavors than my local distributor carries, so
I have written to them as well about expanding their selection. Is it possible
for a consumer to order directly from you? And do you ever have coupons?

Kudos on a great product!

Thank you
**edited**

Hopefully I will get replies and let you know how that goes. Now I just need to know what to do with all these six and half inch tall narrow glass bottles. I mean.. how many glasses slash vases can one woman have before it becomes a serious problem? :o)

And before I forget in my area (North of nowhere) a 13.5 fluid ounce bottle is 1.99. Its two servings, each serving has 16 grams of sugar (I avoid sugar but 16 grams isn’t TOO bad, though it could be lower.) No protein which kind of sucks cause I don’t eat much and I like to only ingest things that I need. 18 carbs.. bad carbs, bad! 5 mgs of sodium, and I don’t worry about sodium since we never salt our food. 70 calories.. Not bad! And no fat or trans fats. So while its not .. well straight up good for you water.. it’s certainly going to do you more good then harm. Plus its jam packed with anti oxidants! Those bad boys kick some butt!

Welcome to the Revolution.

2008-01-21T09:56:00.001-05:00

This first post won't be an auto biography. Well, maybe a short one. I am a single mom, divorced (and happy!) I work full time doing interesting things with paper and soothing irritated men with my clothes on, I go to college part time, online and I live a little north of nowhere.That said I am trying very hard to do my part (and sometimes a few others parts) to make the earth outlast my kids kids kids. At no time will I profess to be perfect and I am not going plastic free, just plastic minimal. I started this blog because my poor sweet friends are probably really sick of my daily IM's spouting off about some plastic offense someone committed or I committed, or the newest thing I found or simply how plastic bags are ruining the world and if we don't turn down the heat were going to fry up all the polar bears.Hopefully I don't sound that hysterical though, heh. I won't always just rant about plastic though, I promise. Sometimes I might blog about a TV show or my kids or some great new recipe I snagged off another website. So stick around, grab a drink (preferably something in a sustainable glass cup) and join the revolution.

Disclaimer: I cannot spell, feel free to correct me.